axman and prostate cancer

Cancer Clinical Trials - the book

2012-01-18T15:44:00.000-08:00

In just a couple of months, the book Dr. Tom Beer and I have been working on for the past two years will be published by DiaMedica Publications.

Cancer Clinical Trials is a comprehensive guide for anyone considering a Clinical Trial for any form of cancer. It is focused on the information the person with cancer needs to know in order to make the best decisions about their care and the possibilities of new and promising treatments.

It will help you understand the experimental drug approval process (that's what clinical trials are for - no new drugs can be approved without the clinical trial process).

It will tell you how clinical trials are developed and managed.

It will help you find and enroll in a clinical trial.

It will help you decide if a clinical trial might help you.

Cancer Clinical Trials will be officially published in April, but pre-orders can happen at any time.

Check out the Publishers Website - Cancer Clinical Trials.
Check out our Facebook page .
And check out our Cancer Clinical Trials Blog.

axman
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How Your Mind Can Play Tricks on You

2012-01-11T10:23:00.000-08:00

At least minedoes—all the time

For almost nine years I have dutifully gone to see my oncologistevery three months to assess my prostate cancer condition. And I always experiencea little dread (maybe my PSA has gone hog wild—hasn’t happened so far) butthere is also that glimmer of hope that it has gone to zero and I’ll livehappily ever after (of course that hasn’t happened either).

The PSA isn’t even all that accurate, but for those of uswith ongoing prostate cancer, it’s the best measure we currently have. The weekbefore the oncologist appointment there are blood tests and sometimes othertests as well. No problem. It’s finding out the results that’s brings on theanxiety. In my case, my blood pressure spikes every time.

Worse yet, many of us guys (including me) probably put toomuch stock in the results of those tests—an increase in PSA is discouraging anda decrease is encouraging. That makes sense except for the times it’s notlogical. E.g. if a PSA score goes from 5.1 to 5.5 (not even statisticallysignificant) it feels like bad news. If the PSA goes from 91 to 89 (again, notstatistically significant) there is a feeling of new hope. So the numbers don’tseem to be as important as whether they trend ever so slightly up or down.

My PSA scores have had ups and downs like a mini rollercoaster over the years. Except for a brief time after surgery and radiation (whenit was nearly zero) it has fluctuated from two to four to three to five and backand forth depending on the current treatment and how long I’ve been on it. Notreatment has helped for more than a year or two. Some new medications helpimmediately and some don’t help at all. There are many, many meds yet to try sothis situation is likely to go on and on and on...

I don’t think about these things very often and most of theguys I know who are in my condition (just dropped in to see what condition mycondition was in) say the same thing. 99% of the time I’m positive oroblivious, and then there’s that 1% of the time when I fall prey to mindtricks, emotional reactions, and the failing logic of ‘what if’. But this won’tbe a problem for another three months, so let life go on.

axman

2012—Will THIS be the Year of the Prostate Cancer Cure?

2011-12-30T10:08:00.000-08:00

Probably not, but...

For several years now, there has been progress in findingtreatments that lengthen life and reduce side effects for guys with prostatecancer. Much of the research has focused on late-stage cancer. The improvementshave been positive--but modest.

There will be an increased focus on a relatively new approach‑‑cancervaccines‑‑in 2012. These are targeted injections that stimulate your own immunesystem to identify and kill specific cancer cells. The new vaccines will workmuch like the vaccines you have already had for smallpox, measles, and othercommon diseases. Some new vaccines in clinical trials have worked pretty wellfor some people with some cancers and a new vaccine, Provenge, has been approved to treatlate-stage prostate cancer. There is a proven survival benefit—it’s not a cure.

Historically, some major treatments for prostate cancer havedepressed (weakened) the immune system—radiation and chemotherapy are goodexamples. They are also known for their unpleasant side effects. A successful prostatecancer vaccine would do the opposite—strengthen your immune system and buildantibodies that would be protective in the future. There would probably be fewside effects. Sounds good, doesn’t it! Want to know more about cancer vaccines?Check out the NationalCancer Institute.

But there’s a long way to go; even the successful vaccinesdon’t help everybody equally. I’m optimistic! Good luck to all us guys!

axman

How Much is a Long Time?

2011-12-18T22:01:00.000-08:00

Time, it seems, isnot equal for everybody

Another year is almost gone and I didn’t get it all done,again. My prostate cancer decided to ignore my hormone therapy and my new medsdecided to give me more and different side effects. And I noticed somewherealong the way that I’m not 39 any more.

We start most years, the declining years that is, making atleast an informal list of the things we want to do for the next 12 months. Thisalways assumes that we’ll stay healthy, no project will take longer thanplanned, and nothing will cost more than budgeted. You’d think we’d learn, butwe’re kind of stuck in that ‘old dog, new tricks’ thing. We’re not likely tochange our plans and expectations willingly.

It’s been a great year, we’re mostly as healthy as we were atthis time last year, and the projects we didn’t finish will wait a whilelonger—really.

But when it comes to visiting old friends there sometimes isn’ta next year. It has been the sad norm the past few years that we lose a fewgood friends each year. So in 2012 our number one priority is friends andeverything else takes a back seat.

axman

Symptoms, Side Effects, and Winter

2011-12-02T14:30:00.000-08:00

‘tis the season, fa la la la la, la la la la

It has now been six glorious months since I started my Lupron shots—and I’ve already complained a time or two about side effects—sorry.

So I contacted my friends John and Merle, fellow prostate cancer survivors, who have been enjoying Lupron for a year or more to check out their views. Our experiences and reactions have been as similar as if we were conjoined triplets (not a pretty fantasy).

Here are some of our rules and truisms of reality:

1. When it’s winter you should always try to keep warm—extra layers of clothing, extra blankets, and a couple extra degrees on the thermostat, until...

2. The hot flashes flash. Then, take off the extra layers, take off the extra blankets, and step out into the cold (if possible) and take a few deep cool breaths. It’ll help your body cool down. Once cooler, repeat steps one and two indefinitely.

3. The trick is remembering when to do which and vice versa—really not so hard if you happen to be awake and alert (not always guaranteed). And finally...

4. Repeat this short mantra to yourself; “The worse the side effect the more effective the medication must be.” Everybody nod in unison, close your eyes, click your heels together three times, and truly believe that this is true.

axman

The Value of a Support Network in Cancer Treatment - Basics

2011-11-25T08:19:00.000-08:00

Guest Blog by David Haas

A cancer diagnosis can be a life changing event for many people, but having a caring and nurturing support network can make cancer treatment and recovery easier.

Cancer is usually caused by the uncontrolled replication of cells in a body, outside of normal regulatory mechanisms. While some forms of cancer can be asymptomatic, cancer treatments such as chemotherapy may cause a variety of symptoms in a patient. Chemotherapy works by preventing growth of rapidly reproducing cells. While this does prevent malignant cells from reproducing, chemotherapy can also impact other rapidly growing cells, leading to hair loss, libido changes, energy loss, depression, and systemic pain.

A support network can be a valuable tool in a cancer treatment program. While a doctor can be a valuable resource for medical information, it’s important to have a group of people one can relate to in a non-professional environment. Cancer support networks are available for a wide range of patients, ranging from rare cancers like mesothelioma to more common cancers like pancreatic cancer and breast cancer.

Many cancer patients can feel isolated, and may feel that no one understands what they are going through. While friends and family are an important part of a support network, a patient may feel that these people are unable to relate to what they are going through. By joining a support network, an individual undergoing chemotherapy can discuss symptoms, diet, exercise, and therapy with other people going through the same experience as him or her.

A cancer support network can also help prevent anxiety and depression, while offering social and recreational opportunities for a patient. If a patient is isolated during treatment, he or she may experience an existential crisis. Many cancer support networks offer a variety of recreational opportunities appropriate for patients, including vacations, simple sports activities, and shopping opportunities. Exercise is an important part of cancer therapy, and a support network offers the opportunity to interact and physically engage with individuals similar to one’s self.

Cancer support networks can also be valuable for patients concerned about their symptoms. While a doctor or therapist can provide textbook definitions of symptoms a patient may experience, it can be valuable to hear real life stories from other cancer survivors, and learn how they dealt with symptoms and emotional distress during recovery.

By: David Haas

davdhaas@gmail.com

The Geezer Time-Space-Speed Continuum

2011-11-15T10:33:00.000-08:00

Didn’t things used to go slower in the good old days?

As some of you may have noticed (or not), as the decades go by your body starts to gradually decompose. You move slower, everything hurts, and the lightning fast reflexes you remember from your youth no longer exist. There’s a theory that your brain slows down, too, but I find that hard to believe (although my kids and grandkids often swear that it’s true).

Along with this long term slowing process the passage of time actually accelerates – like your life is in fast forward mode 24/7. And this speeding time gets faster and faster as you get slower and slower. Not fair, I say—but nobody asked me and I’m told that life is NOT actually fair.

My grandkids are eager to get older so they can drive, go to college, move out on their own, etc. For them, a great life requires that they achieve some magic age in life‑‑16 or 18 or 21.

At the same time, us old folks (me, at least) would like to slow or even reverse the passage of time—at least on occasion. In this strange world grandkids grow up too fast, vacations are over too soon, diseases progress much too rapidly, and even hard work is over too quickly (well, maybe not that one). The only slow things in my life are waiting in the doctor’s office, waiting for that social security check, and waiting for daylight so you can get up because you can’t sleep.

But modern science has given us a solution to this knotty and perplexing oddity of advancing age: and I quote from a leading Geriatric Medical Jouronal, “Suck it up and keep on keeping on”!

axman

To PSA or NOT to PSA--A Man's Dilemma

2011-10-25T12:05:00.000-07:00

...another controversial medical recommendation

Recently, the USPSTF (U.S. Preventive Services Task Force) published a recommendation against routine PSA screening for men of all ages. They cited numerous clinical studies (some inconclusive or contradictory) showing no statistical survival benefit for men getting regular prostate cancer screening with a PSA compared to those men who did not have a PSA screening.

Further, the report pointed out the risk of men having unneeded and risky treatments that could result in impotence, incontinence, infections, heart attacks, and other unpleasant side effects.

There is no way to determine from a PSA test whether a tumor is aggressive (life threatening) or slow growing (not life threatening). A biopsy can help determine the growth rate of a tumor but there is some risk of infection (albeit small) from that invasive procedure.

So, they contend, no screening is better for the 5 out of 6 men who are likely to never get prostate cancer. And of the 1 in 6 who will get prostate cancer some will have a slow growing type and will not need immediate treatment.

But what about those poor guys (like me) who have or will have an aggressive (life threatening) tumor in their prostate? Although statistically not significant, determining risk and getting treatment early would be really helpful‑‑maybe even life saving.

Maybe the problem is not with the PSA test, which can detect cancer, but with the decision making by doctors and patients after the test. Could this, perhaps, be an area for further study?

I have had and will continue to have PSA tests on a regular basis. I know a number of men who are being treated for an aggressive form of prostate cancer. To a man they are happy to have been diagnosed and treated and still be alive. Me, too. We do not believe that our lives are not significant. The discussion is not over. There must be a better solution!

axman

The Therapeutic Benefits of Good Times and Good Friends

2011-10-09T23:18:00.000-07:00

...this probably doesn’t show up much in the clinical trials and statistical research data

In my last blog entry‑‑September 26‑‑I mentioned the group of people we met in a clinical trial last year. Last week we hosted the group at our newly renovated farm house. It rained, of course, because this is Oregon.

The meeting was a little sad because we missed John (see last blog entry) but once the group assembled (out of the rain on our new covered patio) the mood was definitely upbeat. A little wine, some barbecued chicken and a lot of conversation. Some of it was small talk, more than a little was prostate cancer related (stages, meds, hot flashes, the latest PSA, etc.), some future plans, and lots and lots of heartfelt laughter. Imagine that; sick old people laughing and carrying on like a bunch of kids!

This group of 20—now 19—has a unique ability to lift my spirits. Whatever I might call it, the real purpose of the group is people support. And it works for me.

Our backgrounds are diverse and prostate cancer is the only obvious thing we have in common (except for old age). But we also share an irreverent sense of humor, an honest concern for each other, and a determination to continue fulfilling those entries on our bucket lists. So far‑‑so good.

I’m looking forward to our next get together in December and in March and in July and... I'm sure everybody else is, too.

axman

Still Another Friend Lost to Prostate Cancer

2011-09-26T12:59:00.000-07:00

John Helmer was a quiet, caring, and friendly man. He was a well known businessman in the Portland, Oregon area for more than 60 years. I met him in a Prostate Cancer Clinical Trial program at Oregon Health and Science University in 2010. It was an exercise program for men with prostate cancer and their spouses - to help determine the effects of continued regular exercise on the health and longevity of prostate cancer patients.

It turned out that the men and women in the program enjoyed being together, formed a bond, and we have continued meeting every few months over the past year - long after the program had finished.

John was a world traveler, mountain climber, cyclist, and marathon runner. It turns out that we both ran the Boston Marathon the same year - almost 30 years before actually meeting. He was 88, but he seemed much younger. Carol and I will miss him as will his wife Beverly, his large extended family, and his very large circle of friends.

I raise a toast to John: a good man, a friend, and a terrific example for the rest of us.

axman

How Many Hot Flashes is Too Many?

2011-09-15T21:52:00.000-07:00

...trick question^__you can never have enough!

Since being promoted to Lupron a couple months ago my hotflashes have gradually increased in number and intensity—at least half a dozenprivate mini saunas every day.

They appear mostly at night. Strangely, I wake up about aminute before it happens, then beads of sweat pop out on my forehead and thewarmth moves on down to the rest of my body and for a couple of minutes I’m toasty warm all over—sometimestoo toasty. I usually get up and walk around and often step outside in anattempt to cool down faster and get back to sleep.

Then, an hour or two later, it starts all over again. Myposse (half a dozen friends and acquaintances who are also doing the LupronChemo thing) assures me my experience is pretty standard. So why am I tellingyou all this? Well, if you have prostate cancer and it has recurred afterinitial treatment, you’re likely to experience something similar sooner orlater.

Lucky you! Really! If you get to the hourly steam bath stageit means you’re still alive and you’re keeping the cancer under some level ofcontrol. And the sweat is just a part of the blood, sweat, toil, and tears oflife (thank you Winston Churchill for those kind words).

axman

That Elusive Happy Medium

2011-08-28T12:38:00.000-07:00

...and I don’t mean a hard to find, but pleased, fortune teller

Most of my life has been pretty busy—raising a family, personal and family activities, and work; often two or more jobs at a time. I never really thought about it, but there wasn’t too much time to sit around and relax or ponder or even feel sorry for myself. It must have worked because all in all I’m pretty healthy and happy (It seems I missed out on the wealthy and wise part of the equation).

Retirement changed that pattern. There have been the super busy times—like building and remodeling this past year—and a few times when we just sat around and read or napped. Doing nothing for too long turns out to be really boring. And that seems to be a common thread among some retirees. Doing too much for too long turns out to be really tiring. And getting tired is easier as I get older.

Right now there are too few relaxing times but that should change in a month or two when we head to Arizona for a few weeks of R and R without much of anything to do and we can head home when it gets boring.

Right now there’s building and finishing a book and always something that should have been done yesterday. But I’m trying to look at life one day at a time and that seems to be a good mantra and helps keep the stress level down.

My goal over the next year or so is to find a balance of activity and relaxation that seems to work. Maybe I’ll call it the Geriatric Goldilocks Syndrome—not too much; not too little; but jusssst right. How hard could it be?

axman

One Year at a Time

2011-08-14T19:10:00.000-07:00

Youth is fleeting; old is forever. Maybe it’s better not to know what all is going on in my body‑‑and how much and how fast...

As another birthday rolls by (this is number 71) Life is good. Although I feel OK now, when I look back there have been quite a few changes in a mere eight short, short years since I was diagnosed with prostate cancer (the years really have seemed short).

· I ran my last marathon in 2005 and now have difficulty running even two or three miles. Knee surgery had a hand (or knee) in that. I haven’t given up completely on running, however. But I also jumped out of an airplane for the first time (and the last time so far) on my birthday that same year. ...almost balances out, doesn’t it?

· I retired in 2007 and started slowing down a little in how much I can get done—I still get things done, but it takes longer. I’ve been able to write (finishing my second book since retirement—but I’ve cleverly managed to avoid making any money at it) and putter around the house and a nap every few days helps. We’ve done some major remodeling but with a lot of younger, smarter hired help.

· Take my bladder, please! It was normal and healthy in 2003 but surgery, radiation, and hormone therapy have reduced its efficiency and predictability a bit. If you happen to have an extra one...

· All those same events and meds have also waged war on my testosterone level (keeping it low is necessary to keep me alive, of course) as well. Oh, well.

· I need more sleep, stronger glasses, and more time in the hot tub to ease the old joints.

I’m sure the aging process itself is to blame for some or even most of this. Most of my friends have experienced at least some of these events.

Adapt, adjust, suck it up, and carry on. There are still unfulfilled entries on my Bucket List but the list of things I have done already is a lot longer. I wouldn’t trade my life for anybody’s. I’ve been blessed with a great family, good friends, time to do most of the things I want to do, and occasionally a bottle of really good wine.

axman

Lost Another Friend to Prostate Cancer

2011-08-03T11:58:00.000-07:00

We first met when we lived in Canada in the 1970s and our families have been friends for the past 40 years. Dennis was, at various times, my neighbor, my student, my building contractor, and my colleague (he became a psychologist). He was active, smart, ambitious, and musically talented (he played in a rock band in his 60s). He had a knack for helping others—whether building their house or counseling their marital problems.

He was diagnosed only four years ago but the cancer was already advanced. He received multiple treatments to slow the tumor growth but nothing was very successful. His church and family ties helped keep him strong and positive.

No matter what progress you hear about in cancer treatment, it all boils down to the individual person. I can only hope that somebody somewhere finds a way to slow down prostate cancer (or even cure it) before I lose more friends.

axman

The Long Hot (Flash) Summer

2011-07-25T15:12:00.000-07:00

Not much sun, but the heat comes in the middle of the night

Three weeks after my Lupron shot I don’t feel much different than I did before. There is one notable exception – the dreaded hot flash.

During the day I keep pretty busy writing, building, pouring concrete, cutting weeds, and other manly activities with nary a flash of hot. That’s good. But once I go to sleep I can count on at least one and usually two bouts with heat and sweat during the night. Worse yet, it wakes me up-so I get up, change my jammies, go to the bathroom, turn my pillow over to the dry side, and try to get back to sleep. I usually succeed.

None of these bouts lasts more than a few minutes and they’re certainly not unbearable. My wife just smiles and says, “See, I told you what they were like”. Mostly it’s an annoyance and results in a lot of extra laundry the next day.

I’m sure many of you have more and worse side effects so this will be my last time complaining about this particular one. Probably. But if I should ever have a new one...

axman

The Next Step – Lupron

2011-07-07T21:51:00.000-07:00

With a shot in my backside I was launched into a new phase of prostate cancer treatment...

I knew this day would come sooner or later (I’d prefer later‑‑given a choice). My substitute oncologist (Dr. G) recommended a change in medication because my PSA has gone up significantly every three months for almost a year on the old hormone meds. Lupron was her drug of choice. It’s stronger than the hormones I’ve been taking and is supposed to lower my PSA in a short time (stay tuned for my October PSA test). I know many thousands are already using Lupron, so let me know what your experiences have been.

The shot is good for three months so I don’t have to take so many pills—that’s a plus. But the side effects may be a little stronger and stranger. I can expect hot flashes, some bone pain, headaches, depression, and maybe weight gain (I can probably fight those last two). On the inside my bones will likely lose mass. So I’ll take more calcium, more D3, spend time in the sun, and get lots of exercise. Fatigue in another side effect but I’m already tired so may not even notice.

I intend to let the summer unfold, bask in the sun, keep busy building more rooms onto the house, and continue doing all the things on my Bucket List.

axman

The Medical Merry-Go-Round and Round

2011-06-28T11:06:00.000-07:00

Sometimes no results are good results and vice versa

Over the past few weeks I’ve experienced a medical anomaly or two—nothing unusual in the aging process, however.

1 I experienced a minor TIA (transient ischemic attack) or mini stroke. My left side went weak and numb for a couple of minutes. Then everything was back to normal again. I chomped a couple aspirin and made an appointment with my doctor who then sent me to a hospital for further tests.

2 The next day I had a couple of dizzy spells and that has continued for several weeks, although somewhat diminished. So the doctor also scheduled me to see an ENT (Ear, Nose, and Throat specialist).

3 At the hospital they first did an ultrasound to see if my carotid arteries might be blocked. Nope. Then came the MRI of my head. The report (several days later) said, “We looked at his brain and found nothing.” That confirms the common consensus of my intellectual standing.

4 A few days later I saw the ENT, got probed, had a long tube inserted up my nose, and even got a hearing test. Nothing explained the dizziness, sorry, and good-bye.

So in conclusion; events happened, medical tests occurred, reports were written, and everything remained pretty much the same. That’s good, I guess.

axman

More Side Effects of Aging

2011-06-15T07:30:00.000-07:00

It’s not fair and it never ends, but I haven’t found a reasonable alternative...yet

I’m only half joking when I tell friends and family that life has several clearly identifiable stages.

Stage one – You live and slow down gracefully from birth to age 60.

Stage two – You age as much between 60 and 70 as you did from zero to 60.

Stage three – The jury is still out.

It’s the truth. At a youthful 60 I could still run ultra marathons, work 16 hour days, and keep up with the grandkids. Not so at an ancient 70. Between the medical side effects from my prostate cancer meds and the inevitable side effects of physical aging the changes are clearly evident to me (and probably everybody else, too).

Slowing down, taking it easy, and enjoying life really sounds good—actually doing it has been a lot more difficult that it sounds. I’m working on it. But there are so many things needing to be done and watching somebody else doing them (instead of me) just doesn’t feel right. Being a useless old man is not something on my Bucket List. My wife nods and smiles whenever I say it, however.

Stay tuned—I’ll chart my progress, or lack thereof, toward the good if not the useful life. But now it’s time to take my pills and then my nap.

axman

Weather or Not, That is the Question

2011-06-03T10:38:00.000-07:00

La Nina, El Nino, Global Warming, Climate Change, and infernal rain

As a wee child I remember being amused when all the old folks sat around and cursed the weather (too wet, too hot, too dry, too windy, or too something else). The physical complaint of the day was rheumatism. Now I find myself doing the same thing, and worse yet my mental and physical health seem to wax and wane according to the temperature and precipitation. Rheumatism is no longer at the top of the list, but the process hasn’t changed. I have become my parents and grandparents. I’m not sure this is all bad but, like many people I know, I didn’t think it would ever happen to me.

I am sure that weather and climate don’t have all that much to do with my health and happiness but sometimes it sure seems that way. Once the weather changes I’ll be one of those complaining about 90 degree days, sunburn, and heatstroke (probably). Maybe I need to stay busier or get more creative or just get a life.

You’ve probably seen the research that points out how people are more depressed in the winter and drink more alcohol where the winter is longer. People generally live longer in warmer climates (I think diet and lifestyle may factor in there, too) and sunshine helps create Vitamin D3 that is supposedly good for all of us (what’s good or not good for us seems to change on a regular basis so don’t count too heavily on D3 forever). I can remember when large amounts selenium, iron, and vitamin C were also supposed to be good for you. And chocolate and coffee and wine were bad. We can all count on change.

So I’ll try to ignore the weather (pretend like it's warm and sunny), eat what seems to be good for me (or what I really like), and carry on as if the universe was unfolding as it should.

axman

OMG—something to make Me Feel even Older

2011-05-23T08:45:00.000-07:00

And I’ve even got old kids to prove it

My oldest son turns 48 this week. That’s good. He’s healthy, successful, and still keeps in touch with his elderly parents. All five kids are over 40 and then there are five teen-aged grandkids (and one mere babe). All this is good.

When I turned 70 I did a quick inventory of my aches and pains (there were more than a few) and determined that, in fact, I was getting older and more decrepit. But in my mind I was still 30. As the kids get older and older it’s hard to claim 30 or 40 or 50 or even 60.

I feel my true age more days in a week or a month than I used to. I have more side effects from those ever-increasing prescription strengths. I’m still alive, so all this is good, too.

Bottom line‑‑I guess I’ll have to come to terms with being young at heart, ancient of body, and the elder in my family (not as prestigious as in past generations). And I’m getting used to all those gray-haired kids of mine (at least in those who have hair).

axman

If More is Better…

2011-05-13T13:59:00.000-07:00

...then I should be more better

About a month ago I discovered that my PSA had doubled since January. It also doubled between October and January. So that resulted in yet another increase in my main meds (bicalutamide). I have gone from a daily dose of 50mg in September to 100mg in January to 150mg in April.

It’s not hard to swallow them—the pills are very small—so that’s not a problem. There is the cost factor and my razor sharp math skills have led me to the conclusion that the cost of three-a-day is triple that of one-a-day (you see, I passed 9^th grade math).

So far it appears that there is no increase in obvious side effects like green spots on my skin, appendages falling off, or decreased brain function (it’s already at an all time low). But there is one little thing that stands out; I seem to need more sleep and rest. I’m not sure that fatigue is even on the list of 437 contraindications (possible side effects) printed out on the paperwork that accompanies my prescription.

As for me, however, whatever the actual reason (age, mental breakdown, physical collapse, the heartbreak of psoriasis, or climate change) I get tired sooner, need a nap oftener, and just doing my normal daily chores (as assigned by my wife) brings on heavy breathing (not the good kind).

What’s next? Pretty soon I’ll just stay asleep 24/7 and avoid all that interfering social stuff that now goes on every day between naps.

axman

Beware of Omega-3 fatty acids–Are They now Your Enemy?

2011-05-02T07:48:00.000-07:00

...but just a few months ago they were considered OK, even better than OK...

If you’re a man who has prostate cancer, by now you’ve seen the articles‑they’re everywhere‑pointing out the results found at the Fred Hutchinson Cancer Research Center in Seattle. Men with faster growing prostate cancer are more likely to have it get even more aggressive if they eat a lot of fatty fish or omega-3 fatty acids. Those with the highest levels of DHA (an omega-3 fatty acid) were two and a half times more likely to have high-grade prostate cancer. This is exactly the opposite of what was expected. Common sense be damned, again.

The results are based on an old clinical trial – the Prostate Cancer Prevention Trial that started way back in the 1990s. I was one of more than 18.000 men in that trial (it turned out I was in the placebo - sugar pill - group) which was actually stopped early. Now, 15 years after it all started another strange result. While omega-3 fatty acids are still considered to be good for your heart; it seems they can be deadly to your prostate cancer.

In another twist, it seems that trans-fatty acids (bad, bad for your heart) cut your risk. Men with high levels of trans-fats in their blood were 50 percent less likely to have high-grade prostate cancer. The study doesn’t mention how much their heart attack or stroke risk is increased.

So, I guess I’ll go eat some French Fries and slow down my prostate cancer. I wonder when they’ll publish research telling me that wine and beer will make my cancer worse? I may have to quit reading.

axman

Burn Baby, Burn!

2011-04-28T14:36:00.000-07:00

...or, cleaning up the mess

For much of the past week we have been burning large piles of brush, junk, limbs, and other debris. Over the long, long winter the wind and rain managed to knock down hundreds of limbs around the farm. Most of the pieces were small but some limbs were the size of small trees.

There seems to be something therapeutic about building and tending a fire‑maybe it’s a faint connection to our prehistoric DNA or something. It’s hard work cutting, dragging, and piling the pieces, but once the fire gets crackling its almost hypnotic and energizing. The heat can get intense but I don’t mind (of course the cold weather makes the heat feel better, too). The only trouble with using a fire to keep warm is that one side of you is always cold.

Others have told me the same thing‑a big fire has some kind of power to keep us mere humans hanging around feeding it. From time to time a hot ember lands someplace where there is a bit of bare skin but no permanent damage is done. The little burn holes in my sweatshirt and jeans don’t heal so easily.

So when I need to get away from my normal rat race, a good roaring fire is just the thing!!

axman

Thinking – a Mere Artifact of the Past?

2011-04-17T09:20:00.000-07:00

No, I’m not specifically referring to my senility and overall mental decline – that’s bad enough, of course.

I would like to think I’m a thinker; wouldn’t we all. After 70 years of hanging around the planet I should have developed some skills of observation, calculation, and evaluation. I never got rich and I have some health problems, but there’s still that hope of making up my own mind – such as it is.

But when I take a close look at areas in my life it seems that thinking is discouraged rather than encouraged. Maybe I'm just terminally cynical, but... for example...

· Every day somebody on TV or on the radio or even a Facebook ‘friend’ is telling me what to think politically. No facts are presented to help me make up my own mind. Mostly the communication consists of less-than-half-truths, clichés, and flat out lies. “Don’t think, just agree – and of course vote MY way.

· Advertisers (name your media) do much the same. “Buy our product because this is a cute, but flawed, commercial.” Don’t think, just buy MY product.

· Religion? People knocking at my door with brochures? Hate mongering? Not many facts to hang a decision on here. Don’t think, just believe MY way (or else) – and of course send money.

· Now I don’t expect any of this to get any better and the whole conversation is a bit exhausting. So, I think I’ll have a glass of wine. You see, there IS still room for thinking!

axman

Why Doesn’t My PSA ever go Down?

2011-04-07T23:24:00.000-07:00

Don’t I wish…

Every couple of weeks I put something on my blog that relates a lot or a little to my prostate cancer. It’s easier to write about other people and other issues. After my visit to the oncologist last week, I guess it’s time to focus on me again.

After nearly eight years, my prostate cancer is pretty well under control; managed but not cured. It’s still there but seems to be pretty quiet. But my low PSA doubled from September to December and again from December to March. That hadn’t happened in more than three years – since I started taking low dose hormones. My prescription was doubled in December and increased again just last week.

Most guys with incurable prostate cancer know that sooner or later, whatever treatments and meds they’ve had, their cancer will find a way to grow anyway and their PSA will increase – and increase. There are several levels of medications and I’m still at (almost) the lowest hormone treatment level. There is an inevitable progression once prostate cancer isn’t cured by first level treatments.

Progression is slow, no need to worry, no need to make any new decisions just now, but there will be a time when I’ll go to another level of treatment – maybe instead of pills, it’ll be delivered by injection or IV. Maybe there will be new medications to try or new and promising clinical trials. I’m not holding my breath waiting for a cure just now.

I’ll take my increased meds (hopefully my prescription plan will still pay) and wait and see. There really aren’t any changes in diet or exercise or lifestyle that might make a difference – I’ve tried to do all the right things already.

axman

When I’m NOT the Only Sick One

2011-03-28T18:52:00.000-07:00

It’s easy to get hung up on your own problems, until …..

For several years now I’ve been writing little blurbs every few weeks about me. That’s what this blog was set up to do – focus on prostate cancer, what’s happening in the research field, but mostly how I cope (or don’t), what worries me, how my prostate cancer is progressing, what hurts, what doesn’t work any more, and on and on.

A couple of weeks ago my wife Carol started to cough a lot and feel weak. After a couple of days I convinced her to see a doctor in Arizona near where we were staying. Diagnosis - bronchitis and sinusitis; here’s a bunch of medicine. Should start to get better in a few of days. Five days later she felt worse. In addition to weakness and coughing she now had earaches and headaches. Back to the doctor. Ear infection, antibiotics, pain pills, and keep taking all the other meds, too. Then came the fever – higher at night, lower in the daytime. Finally when we got to Boise, now with an added fever, she ended up in Emergency for an IV of fluids to combat dehydration.

To complicate matters, we were in the process (slowly) of heading home from Arizona to Oregon by way of Las Vegas and Boise. We stopped often and Carol sleeps a lot on the way. Bertha (our big red truck) has reclining seats and a pretty smooth ride. I have come to realize just how much I depend on Carol to tell me where something is in the suitcase, where we turn off the freeway to get to the next Starbucks, or where the motel reservation printout is.

Friends have told us they had a similar set of symptoms and it took three or four weeks before they were back to normal. That’s a long time. She doesn’t complain except that she’s annoyed she can’t walk without feeling weak and dizzy and that she nods off in the middle of a conversation or watching a TV show.

Home in Oregon and its back to the doctor (three different locations – three doctors). I wish I could do more to help. Other than being there and doing what she needs at the moment, I feel pretty worthless. But we’ll both feel better in a week or two – for sure!

axman

The Cold, Cold Facts

2011-03-10T11:05:00.000-08:00

What’s new in Prostate Cancer Treatment?

Every year or so I take another look at what’s happening (or not happening) in the prostate cancer wars. The answer (from my standpoint) in a nutshell is: not too much.

For eight years now I’ve been waiting for the next big breakthrough in prostate cancer treatment. All the ‘miracle’ cures I’ve been able to track down have proved to be less than advertised, anecdotal, unsupported, or downright fraudulent. That doesn’t mean there haven’t been improvements, new approaches, and new and better drugs (for example, keeping me alive 2.5 months longer is a step in the right direction but NOT a miracle cure in my estimation).

Genetics

Advances in the study of genetic inheritance may help in future prevention – I’m sure it will help my grandkids and their grandkids. This is a long, long term project.

Diagnosis

The PSA test is imperfect, new urine tests are being tested, biopsies in color are being developed to find cancers that don’t show up in black and white - and the controversy over testing or not testing rages on. It still seems that being diagnosed early is a good idea but there can also be a misdiagnosis and needless treatment. I am glad I was diagnosed when I was.

Vitamins

There IS such a thing as too much of a good thing. Vitamins that can help can also harm if taken in very large quantities. Diet and exercise and vitamins are good. But they aren’t a silver bullet.

Treatments

As time goes by, surgery, radiation, and other procedures become refined and more precise and do less damage to other organs and functions. This is a slow process but a good one for the men who will have these treatments in the future.

As I grow older and older I am still glad that I am getting older rather than the other dubious alternative. Maybe the big breakthrough will happen next month

axman

Life (ours) Doesn’t have to Slow Down Unless We want it to

2011-02-25T06:09:00.000-08:00

…it’s (almost) always a choice

We’ve been here in the vast Arizona desert for more than three weeks now. That’s good. We’ve become tan, rested, and done an amazing amount of necessary work. We’ve been busy 12 hours a day (including some time to drink wine, of course) but it seems mostly like fun.

We have chosen to stay busy in our physically and mentally declining years (our kids and grandkids would probably say something even stronger about the decline part). There will probably come a time when we have no choice but to slow down but we’ll put that on the back burner as long as possible.

This week we had visitors in the desert – Tom (co-author) and his family were here five days so we could work on the new book – but mostly we hiked and jeeped all over the desert and a good time was had by all. His kids loved the desert and particularly bumping around the dirt roads and trails in jeeps. Jeeping through the desert in the dark (with the headlights on, of course) was the most exciting.

Oh yeah, Tom and I signed a publishing contract and now have to deliver a completed manuscript by July 1st. That seems like a long time from now, but… how hard could it be (he innocently asked)?

Carol has been doing bookkeeping and taxes for a friend and now is doing ours and those of a couple of the kids.

And I picked up a couple of grad students – non-traditional, at-a-distance learners. I work with them on courses and research – all by email and websites. It only takes a few hours a week and I enjoy it.

axman

A Secondary Benefit of Having Cancer

2011-02-10T09:52:00.000-08:00

OK, there really aren't ANY benefits from cancer , but…

After a couple of years battling prostate cancer I decided to write a book about it. I enjoyed the writing and illustrations/cartoons (Real Men Get Prostate Cancer Too) and I think it was therapeutic – it kept me busy and positive. Of course it would have been nice if it sold a few thousand more copies. Oh well.

Now I’m writing another cancer book (about clinical trials) – with a partner this time. Tom is my oncologist and a well known cancer researcher. There is even a publisher who appears to be interested in it. Go figure!

I’ve been working on it - on and off – for more than a year. But now we’re looking at coming up with a finished manuscript in just a few months.

This is both exciting and a little frightening. There is a lot yet to do and so little time… My first book was self-published so I didn’t actually have to satisfy anybody but me. This time around there’s a co-author and an all-powerful publisher. I won’t have the same control but still all of the same responsibility – to myself, my co-author, and the publisher. Guess I’ll have to learn to live with the stress. Of course, I wouldn't be doing this if I didn't enjoy it.

axman

Getting Away Yet Again

2011-02-01T17:18:00.000-08:00

The benefits of variety in life – at least MY life

Being in the same place and doing the same thing (more or less) day after day and week after week is my idea of hell.

Maybe it’s just my bad Karma, a highly regrettable character flaw, or just plain old fashioned wander lust. But when I’m traveling or camping or just doing something new and different and at least a little challenging I feel better. Mentally and physically – my aches and pains diminish (a little anyway) and my attitude improves (a little anyway). Don’t ask my wife to verify this; she’ll say I’m a grouch all the time.

Now we’re in Arizona for a few weeks of fun, rest, and a little work. When it’s over the next little adventure will begin. …and then the next one and the next one and the next one...

I suppose life would be easier if I was content to stay home and bloom where I was planted – but I’m not all that ready to be planted yet!

axman

Yet another Escape from the Cold

2011-01-23T12:06:00.000-08:00

How many times do I need a getaway? As many times as possible…

I’ve given up on staying warm – especially when I am outside all day in the wet and cold at least pretending to work. Our new garage is at a point where we can close it up and head to Arizona to thaw. I intend to warm up, rest up, and cheer up in the sunshine. I also intend to do some reading and hiking and napping and drinking – not necessarily in that order.

There is always something more to do but most of the time it can wait until I’m ready to do it – not always, but nearly always. And there’s always the possibility that somebody else will do it while I’m gone – maybe leprechauns or fairies or elves or menehunes… - I’m not holding my breath.

More and more I am accepting that I actually need more 'down time' than I did in previous decades of my life. Invincible ends at some point.

And I really do need to get some work done on the new book – with Tom my co-author. Maybe I can convince him to do all the writing and I can wander in the desert and enjoy the warm weather – now that’s a plan worthy of more consideration.

axman

Cold, Colder, Coldest…

2011-01-10T08:34:00.000-08:00

…and more Coldester (OK, so I just made that up – but it IS accurate)

Ever since we returned from Hawaii in early December I have been cold. There has been an unusual preponderance of cold, ice, snow, and torrential rain this winter. I have been working outside nearly every day to try to get our new garage finished. It has been 50 years since I worked outside in the cold on a daily basis – my night job pumping gas while I was in college.

Am I cold all the time because of advanced age, serious disease, senility, being cursed by Trolls, or some combination of some or all of the above? I wish I knew.

Whatever the cause, I just can’t seem to get warm – and another cold spell is on the way. There’s a lot yet to be done on the garage, including the digging, leveling, and pouring of a concrete floor. That should help keep me warm, hopefully.

But all is not lost. When it’s done (mostly) we’re heading to the Arizona desert for a month or so to warm up. The downside? It has been unusually cool in Arizona this winter, too. I have concluded, however, that a daily high of 60 in Arizona beats a high of 30 in Oregon – by my calculations that's twice as good as a matter of fact.

What are your experiences with the cold? Does age or cancer make a difference or am I just a wuss? Be gentle with me…

axman

2010 and 2011 and all that Stuff

2011-01-01T00:04:00.000-08:00

Tempus Fugit – it really does!

Happy New Year yet again. 2010 was a pretty good year (after all, here we all are in 2011). In 2010 I celebrated my 70^th Birthday and 50^th Anniversary (with the help of my loving and eternally tolerant wife, of course).

And I am entering my eighth year with prostate cancer. I may still be crazy after all these years but my cholesterol, blood pressure, PSA, and weight are all still under control. and NOT going crazy. I’ll take that as a good way to start any new year.

Life is good, time flees (what tempus fugit actually means), and there are still pages and pages to go on my Bucket List.

Maybe 2011 will be the year of the cancer-cure breakthrough! …or maybe not. That's probably not within our realm of choices so don't spend a lot of time worrying about it.

All you guys living with prostate cancer keep hanging in there (it certainly beats the alternative) and actually do all the things you want to do (within some fuzzy and probably irrelevant legal limits anyway).

axman

You Can Always Go Home Again...

2010-12-21T17:36:00.000-08:00

Especially for the holidays

We just returned from two great and glorious weeks in Hawaii. It was relaxing and refreshing. I noticed that I was far enough away from home for my pains to subside, my stress level to drop, and I even slept better. Coming home was good, too, it always is, but it was cold and all that work that needed to be done was right there...waiting. On the bright side, it's time for the kids and grandkids to come by for dinner and gift giving and a little sherry and egg nog.

In Hawaii we reconnected with some old (really old) friends from 20 or 30 years ago. Most of them, like me, were in various stages of disease and decline but it didn't seem to matter. There were strokes, knee replacements, an abundance of arthritic pains, and even one friend with Stage 4 prostate cancer. He's in chemo and weakened but still has his irreverent, self-deprecating sense of humor and was constantly cracking jokes.

I came home inspired to be as strong as they all seemed. I intend to laugh more, focus less on my aches and pains, and especially to avoid morbid thoughts about my own mortality. Sounds like New Years Resolutions - time will tell.

So, Merry Christmas, Enjoy Life, and have a Healthy New Year

axman

Culture Shock - Sort Of...

2010-12-04T01:01:00.000-08:00

For several months now my wife and I have been working long hours most days to get our house in shape before winter gets any worse. Aches, pains, fatigue, and cold and wet working conditions have been the norm.

Then, just a few days ago, we packed a bag and flew to Hawaii for two weeks. We didn't make many plans or commitments - just places to stay.

And here we are with almost nothing to do and we're doing it very well so far. It's kind of strange to go from being busy 100% of the time to 0%. It's a shock to the system but somehow we'll manage.

Recharging my batteries is something I need more and more often these days. Fighting (or managing) my prostate cancer takes more energy than I would have thought - I guess it is surprising because of the lack of symptoms. The energy drained by the cancer (and old age) would normally have been used to mix concrete, patch roofs, build shelves, and even run.

I guess I can cope with that for now.

axman

Sleep More – Do Less

2010-11-21T20:34:00.000-08:00

Everybody needs goals

Living a long time is good; being active every day is good; pretending I’m still 40 or 50 or even 60 is not – at least it’s not very realistic.

For example, every few days I need a nap and if I don’t get one I’m nodding off by 9:00 in the evening. There were times in the ‘good old days’ when I could work 16-hour days for weeks on end – and survive just fine. These days I’m lucky to get in six hours of working let alone eight or 10 or 16. And then there’s trying to remember to take my pills in the morning and take my pills at night (I’m not sure what would actually happen if I didn’t).

In my head I know that age and disease slows everybody down (sooner or later) – but I never thought it would happen to ME (I suppose most people feel that way)!

My father was still struggling with this at 90; “Why can’t I work on the roof?” Why can’t I drive at night?” Now I don’t like driving at night.

So, I’m trying (really) to embrace my older, slower self.

axman

The Perils of being a Geriatric Adrenaline Junkie

2010-11-07T18:28:00.000-08:00

…or maybe it’s a benefit

I spent a lot of the last week climbing around on the 2x4 skeleton of a large barn roof. It needed to be replaced and I hired someone younger and more talented to do the hard work but there was still plenty of climbing left for me. Way up there I move pretty slowly and hang on with at least one arthritic hand at all times.

I’ve noticed that I’m a lot more cautious on high ladders and roofs than I was 20 years ago and infinitely more cautious than when I was 18 (no fear in those days). What ever happened to my balance, grip, and confidence?

After all these years I still get a kick from taking a little risk – jumping out of an airplane for my 65^th birthday, driving the Jeep on steep, narrow, mountain ruts…

It’s fun to be just on the edge – not too close, but just enough uncertainty to get the old heart beating a little faster. Push the envelope just a little bit. I may not live longer but I don’t intend to die from boredom.

When I was first treated for prostate cancer (and NOT cured) I asked my doctor how long it would be before it killed me. His reply was: “Don’t worry; you’re more likely to get hit by a bus than die of cancer!” And that’s just how I intend to proceed; watch out buses!

axman

Does a Vacation Make Me Healthier?

2010-10-24T10:05:00.000-07:00

…it sure seems like it does

I really doubt if my PSA or blood pressure or cholesterol level actually improves much when I go on vacation. A vacation rarely results in weight loss (just the opposite) but often does improve my tan and mental outlook. So I may or may not actually be healthier after a week or two of R and R.

We’ve been away from a very busy and stressful few months of moving, repairing the old and new houses, packing, hauling, unpacking, and building new rooms on the new house. The good news is that the move has happened and the new deadlines are now a little softer.

After two weeks of relaxing on the Arizona desert I’m sleeping better and longer, able to focus on doing absolutely nothing, and we hike and jeep on the desert every day. We even get lost now and then – but always find our way back home - it's actually fun.

Now we're back home in the Oregon rain, with a house full of boxes to be unpacked, and many, many, many large and small tasks to be done. But, in yet another month, we’re headed out for another short vacation. It seems to work for us.

If you should come across any evidence that indicates vacations are NOT good for mental and physical health – just keep it to yourself.

axman

Weight Loss - Blessing or Curse or ???

2010-10-10T13:36:00.000-07:00

I'm finally losing some weight after all these years

And I'm not even trying. I gained about 20 pounds in the seven years since my PC diagnosis in 2003.

That wasn't good or healthy and I honestly tried to manage my eating and drinking and exercise - sort of. It was like, "The Devil made me do it" whatever IT was.

For the past six months Carol and I have been participating in a clinical trial focused on strength training and stretching. That's the only really different thing in our lives - except for moving this summer and fall. Losing 15 pounds puts me close to where I was and want to be. It's a far cry from my anorexic days of ultra running but it meets my relaxed old geezer standards.

Will I lose more, gain it back, or stay the same? Stay tuned.

axman

When the Meds Quit Working

2010-10-01T19:33:00.000-07:00

You never know when it’s going to happen – but it will

It was a long seven years ago when I was diagnosed with prostate cancer. For the first year or two I was confident that I would be cured. My doctors were optimistic and all but guaranteed success with my prostatectomy and later with external beam radiation. But it came back. And there were no more surefire cures to try.

Next was a clinical trial – but I had to wait until my PSA was high enough to qualify – had to get unhealthier. The pill I took turned out to be about as effective as a sugar pill – but it didn’t taste as good. And my PSA just kept edging up. Five years into my cancer I started low-dose hormone pills and they kept my PSA at bay pretty well for a couple years. Now I’m taking slightly higher doses of hormones. I am happy that my PSA has been creeping up and not leaping up.

So what happens when the hormone pills don’t work any more (and that time WILL come)? I suppose I’ll get newer and more expensive meds to see if they help. Then there’s always chemo (I have too much hair anyway). With any luck I’ll keep trying newer and more exotic treatments until I’m about 90 and then somebody will finally find a cure. It could happen! The shock of that would probably give me a fatal heart attack.

axman

Who’s Taking Care Now?

2010-09-11T07:33:00.000-07:00

Most of my life it was my turn, but…

The cycle of life is a bit strange – you start our being taken care of by your parents and 40 or 50 years later you may be taking care of them. In between you have your own kids and grandkids to care for. I was prepared for all those things to happen but now it appears that the next step (way down the line of course) will be somebody trying to take care of me.

Our kids are already talking about who will do what and when (probably the “why me” discussions). I don’t want to be taken care of – at least not for a long, long time. I’m not at all sure that I have the temperament to be taken care of (with the exception of doing whatever my wife tells me to do).

I don’t even want to think about the time when my cancer or some other nasty disease or condition will keep me from driving or making medical decisions or even walking.

Granted, planning ahead is a good idea but at some point it means giving up some of my independence. This is going to be a struggle. Or my mind may check out and I’ll never know the difference…

axman

Little Things are becoming More Important

2010-08-28T08:43:00.000-07:00

Or it could be that’s all the energy I’ve got…

Maybe it’s just my senility kicking in but I’ve noticed that a lot of the good things in my life are really pretty simple and basic.

I’m probably getting a little more simple, too of course. In addition to my worldwide adventurous life (in my fantasies, anyway) I find that I enjoy:

Taking a long walk with my wife (and maybe a dog or grandkid or friend from time to time)
Sitting in the hot tub and sipping a hot mug of coffee at six in the A.M.
Petting my pesky cat while she’s snoozing on my lap and I’m watching TV
Nodding off in the recliner for an afternoon catnap – which doesn’t happen nearly enough
Reading a trashy detective novel for a couple of hours of brain dead time

We still spend time with kids and grandkids, travel, go to concerts, jeep through the desert, and camp out in the mountains – we enjoy every minute of it. But the everyday low key activities (or non-activities) are probably just as enjoyable – and a whole lot cheaper. That’s got to be an upside to getting older.

axman

How Terribly Strange…

2010-08-10T18:43:00.000-07:00

...to be seventy

With apologies to Paul Simon (Old Friends from the Bookends album 1968 when I was relatively young); it IS terribly strange. Never in my wildest dreams and fantasies did I ever imagine being seventy. Not that I planned an early demise; but being that old just never seemed real or important.

In my younger days (see, I sound old already) many of the seventy-year olds I knew seemed decrepit, senile, and sometimes couldn’t even care for themselves - at least it seemed that way to me. Just like my kids and grandkids think of me now – at least sometimes. Certainly not all septuagenarians are frail, but numbers count – retirement age, Social Security, and Medicare are based on age and mortality tables. The government is betting we die before we collect very much. Ha! I'm already collecting!

Various and sundry body parts don’t work as well as when I was a mere 50 or 60 but I’m still able to walk and chew gum at the same time – if I’m real careful. Strangely, I don’t feel old (except for those sore knees and arthritic hands and a slipped disc or two). I’m almost always able to find my way home from the grocery store; but just in case there’s a problem I carry a GPS in the car with a Go Home button. It doesn't hurt to be prepared.

When do I start feeling really old? When did you? Let me know. Tell me twice; I’ll probably forget the first time.

axman

Moving On – More or Less

2010-08-01T09:56:00.000-07:00

No, not moving on to a better world; just a better location. Maybe this 26th move will be the last one…

We’re moving in a month or so – lots of people move every day so it’s not really a very big deal. For the past 19 years we’ve lived in the same place. We didn’t plan it that way; it just happened. That’s a record for us. A quick count in my head (always open to review) came up with 26 different places I’ve lived during my life. There may have been more – the 60s and 70s are kind of hazy. Sometimes it was only across the street and sometimes it was 2,000 or 3,000 miles.

This time it’s only seven miles. No big deal geographically. But it seems like a major event. Maybe it’s just that we’re older, sicker, and more tired. And there’s a few tons of junk to deal with – do we trash it, garage sale it, put it on Craig’s list, abandon it, or move it? We’re moving into the country – six wooded acres.

The plan (assuming it works out) is that this will be our last move – until that move to the County Home for the Helplessly Senile, of course. We’ll have plenty of space for us, kids, grandkids, and friends; not to mention dogs, cats, goats and all that privacy. We can do all sorts of strange and exotic things and nobody can see us!

axman

Maybe the PSA saves lives after all - NCI study

2010-07-20T15:18:00.000-07:00

Federal Government Reverses Course,Now Sees Benefit of PSA Testing...
NCI Admits its Previous Prostate Cancer Study was ‘Contaminated’ Following the Release of New Data that Shows PSA Test Saves Lives

The nation’s leading authority on cancer has thrown out its own study on prostate cancer screening, now saying that PSA testing reduces the prostate cancer death rate by nearly 50 percent.

In its July 13th bulletin, the National Cancer Institute says findings from the Göteborg Randomized Population-Based Prostate Cancer Screening Trial - a study NCI partially funded in Sweden - shows “PSA screening substantially improves cancer-specific survival without the extent of over-diagnosisand overtreatment.” The Swedish study showed testing reduces the prostate cancer mortality rate by 44 percent. That prompted NCI to admit there was a “significant amount of contamination” in its earlier Prostate, Lung, Colorectal, and Ovarian study (PLCO), which suggested there was no mortality benefit with the PSA test.“Careless mistakes like this may be costing men their lives. You can’t publish that there is no value in getting tested if you don’t have the right data to back that claim up,” said Skip Lockwood, ZERO’s CEO.

“Admitting you were wrong is the first step - the American Cancer Society has yet to swallow its pride and come clean – so now NCI needs to take action to make things right,” said Lockwood.
In the bulletin, NCI says the PLCO data was contaminated because of “men in the trial who had already undergone screening with a PSA test, which a number of researchers have said may preclude the trial from ever demonstrating a cancer-specific survival improvement.” Regarding its new data from the Swedish study, NCI goes on to quote Dr. Eric Klein of the Glickman Urological and Kidney Institute who says the “data suggesting that a baseline PSA in men in their 40s and subsequent PSA velocity (the rate of increase in PSA levels) can predict both lifetime risk of developing cancer and potentially lethal cancers.”

Why are Sick Old Men so Damn Funny?

2010-07-17T13:04:00.000-07:00

…at least they THINK they are

Of course I’ve always considered myself wittier than the average geezer (my wife says half-witty) but recently I’ve noticed that most of the old guys I talk to who have prostate cancer are always laughing and joking. They seem to share a set of common characteristics:

They are very knowledgeable about their condition and know what treatments have been tried, which worked (a little), and what their prognosis is so there are no surprises or illusions
They are willing and able to discuss prostate cancer intelligently with anybody and don’t get into ‘poor me’ scenarios
They are mostly cool, calm, and good natured
And they have an underplayed, wicked, irreverent, dark sense of humor – particularly regarding their incurable condition. Jokes about incontinence and impotence abound (not much else can be done about these conditions at this point). Side effects, such as enlarged breasts, also make for witty, if not politically correct, repartee.

Is this the result of denial or senility? Possibly. Should we all be more serious? Maybe, but I don’t think so. Laughter is good medicine; even when it comes from bad jokes and unpunny puns. And we need all the good medicine we can get.

There will be plenty of time to worry and be serious later. There is NO evidence that being sane and serious lengthens life. So for now, let the pun times roll!

axman

You Sure Don’t Look Terminal

2010-07-04T13:53:00.000-07:00

Prostate cancer doesn’t make you look very sick…

Whenever I go to one of my doctor’s offices (a disgustingly common occurrence) there will be people in the waiting room in wheel chairs, on crutches, holding oxygen tanks, coughing, bandaged from head to foot, or just sitting with a totally vacant stare. But I (prostate cancer and all) don’t show even the slightest symptom (unless you count gray hair and wrinkles)! I seem out of place around all those sick people.

When I’m around friends or in classes or even meeting people at social events and the conversation comes around to cancer (it always seems to among the old folks in my social circle) I answer their questions about my cancer. Then there’s always the, “Now way,” “Can’t be,” “You don’t look sick,” and “Are you sure” statements. Maybe if I was pale or limped or drooled (more)… I DO have a scar but don’t usually offer to display it in polite company or during casual conversations.

Most cancers, of course, don’t have a lot of visible symptoms – and in fact that’s not really so bad at all. Believe me, I’m happy with my invisible symptoms and hope I never get to the point when I’m obviously sick – even if it means not getting a lot of heartfelt sympathy.

axman

The Advantages of NOT having a Prostate

2010-06-23T13:10:00.000-07:00

Look on the bright side, old timer...

There is, of course, the nasty side of having your prostate surgically ripped from your body. There are side effects you won’t much like: a scar, some pain for a few weeks or months, a reduced sex life, and your bladder control never seems quite the same.

I’ve bemoaned all this and more. But what about the upside? Upside? There’s an upside?

Here is a list of some, if not all, of the obvious and not so obvious benefits I have observed and experienced from no longer having a prostate to kick around.

1. Most important to me - I’m alive seven years later and still counting

2. I never hold up lines in public restrooms (believe me, this can be a godsend)

3. I lost the two ounces the prostate weighed but I hardly notice the weight loss

4. I have an awesome scar to show anyone brave enough to want to see it (so far no one has ever asked to see it)

5. I’m definitely sterile – as if it matters to anyone as old as me

6. I can tell humorous and entertaining stories at parties about tubes and bags and diapers (my wife says definitely NO to this possibility)

7. Once the deed was done, it was done; no specific ongoing treatment – nobody ever gets a prostate implant – not yet anyway…

I consider my prostatectomy one of the more significant events of my life – after marriage, parenthood, grandparenthood, and running a few marathons.

axman

Prostate Cancer has gone to the Dogs

2010-06-13T12:43:00.000-07:00

Maybe they’ll take a bite out of cancer...

We all know that dogs can track the lost and detect drugs at airports and border crossings. Now they have been trained to detect prostate cancer by identifying a specific scent in male urine (which, I’m told, is NOT in the male at the time of diagnosis). This has nothing to do with the dogs in your life that have been unrepentant crotch sniffers.

There are a number of articles and blogs explaining the research and telling you everything except just what exactly it is the dogs are detecting. Here are two links that pretty much sum up the French study.

Sniffing Out Cancer or Study Finds Dogs Can Detect Prostate Cancer will give you more details or maybe just wagging tails.

I’ll bet you really want to know if you’ll encounter a dog the next time you visit your oncologist. Probably not, but stranger things have happened. The dogs in the study were 95% accurate – much better than the reported 85% accuracy of the tried and true PSA. Maybe some combination of blood samples and urine sniffing will turn out to be 99% accurate!

The value of this study is probably in the fact that there is something that can be detected in urine and clever scientists will probably find another, less canine, way to detect it. Sorry Rover, sit, stay, good boy.

For most of us who already have prostate cancer this potential breakthrough won’t do much, but it just might help our sons and grandsons. We’ll see.

axman

Run, Rest, Recover, Repeat - - - Eventually

2010-06-02T14:16:00.000-07:00

It takes a long, long time…

My motives (like me) are more or less pure and simple; I just want to get in shape to run another (ONE more) marathon. How hard could it be? I’ve done it 75 times before. But the dark powers of the universe seem to be conspiring against me (like in a Greek tragedy).

I’m not talking about serious injuries, hurricanes, floods, or even fire. I’m talking about the frailty of my own body and how long it takes to recover from a workout.

I’ve been doing this for six decades or so and have noticed a diabolical trend. In the early days it was pretty easy; I could do two workouts a day with no downside. Then it was one-a-day workouts until my late 40s. For the next 20 years or so I could muster every-other-day training. But now it takes three or four days between even moderate workouts to make sure the kinks are gone, the muscles are no longer sore, and the fatigue has moderated. Not fair.

A little more sleep, longer sessions in the hot tub, and a nap now and then all seem to help. But, time’s a wasting! Where did those ‘runner’s highs’ and ‘endorphins’ go? Maybe there is an age limit. I’ll let you know what I find out.

axman

Us Old Men with Prostate Cancer are actually Living Longer

2010-05-23T08:59:00.000-07:00

...but why?

If you ask ten doctors why their PC patients are living longer you’ll probably get ten different answers. You’ll get the same variety of responses from those of us who have the dreaded PC. We all have an opinion but facts are few.

Is it:

New medications and treatments?
Better diets?
Exercise for the elderly?
Positive attitudes?
All of the above?
Some of the above?
None of the above?

I don’t know for sure if I’m living longer than expected – certainly not longer than I expected. But then I’m a cockeyed optimist – mostly.

Long ago I decided NOT to take it easy and “go gently into that good night” (apologies to Dylan Thomas). I have never seen any evidence that being active and pushing your limits does any harm. And even if it does, it keeps life from being boring.

Life is always terminal so having a terminal disease doesn’t change things all that much – hopefully.

axman

It’s Just like Herding Cats

2010-05-12T13:05:00.000-07:00

My experience with the latest and greatest prostate cancer clinical trial

When I use the term ‘prostate cancer clinical trial’ you probably immediately have visions of old men taking exotic pills, getting strange injections, donating copious quantities of blood and other fluids, having full body X-rays, and tolerating invasive body probes.

Not so - this one is different.

A group of men with incurable prostate cancer and their wives (who do NOT have prostate cancer) were invited to participate in a six month twice weekly closely monitored strength training class. Including my wife and me, there are 20 in each class and husbands and wives work as a team (what an original concept) doing a series of simple but challenging strength building and stretching exercises. The plan is to get stronger, fitter, and ultimately live longer - maybe even save marriages.

The idea of husband and wife working together (a long shot at best) is supposed to increase the possibility of continuing the exercises when the program is completed.

Of course getting 20 old duffers to do anything as a group and stay focused isn’t easy and the instructors/experimenters have their hands full. It’s a lot like, well, herding cats.

axman

Ask Lots and Lots of Questions

2010-05-02T09:18:00.000-07:00

…just don’t expect lots of answers

I see several doctors every two or three months. I give blood, get weighed (and keep gaining), have my blood pressure checked, and am told that nothing has changed. It’s all pretty mundane and boring.

But, I usually have a list of questions to ask – at least a few. I believe it is my job to ask questions – it’s MY life. My doctors likely (at least in their minds) roll their eyes and say, “Oh no, not again.”

Is there anything new in meds or clinical trials?
What’s next when THIS med stops working?
Is it OK if I decide to run a marathon (fantasy thinking)?
What could I be doing that makes the bad cells grow faster?
How am I going to pay for all this?

Do I get answers? Sometimes. Sometimes the doctors ask me what I think. They may or may not listen to my answers.

If I can get them to think about what I’m thinking it just might lead to something in the future (my future).

My lifelong training and education has been to accept that doctors should know the answers and we patients should obediently and quietly listen and obey. Nope.

A friend of mine (who incidentally died of cancer) always said his preferred way to die was to be shot by a jealous husband. I’d prefer to be done in by global warming or even a charging elephant. I’m not sure just what choices I may have at the time.

In the meantime I plan to survive indefinitely and keep asking questions (my doctors may eventually decide on their own way to do me in).

axman

On the Road Again…

2010-04-23T17:12:00.000-07:00

There’s no place like home, but…

Whether it’s around the block or around the country, it’s good to be on the go. Really.

I have been in a seven-year prostate cancer holding pattern – a series of treatments, no cures, just doing what needs to be done to keep progression as slow as possible. That’s as good as it’s going to get far as I can tell. But I have also noticed that when I’m at home for any extended period of time – particularly in the wet Oregon winter (October until May) I tend to think more about my cancer and aches and pains.

So, we do a lot of running around (traveling makes us sound too sophisticated). We visit friends around town, spend time with kids and grandkids in other states, go to lots of historical spots, and do more than our share of camping and hiking in the summers. We even get out of the country once in a while. Our kids gave up any hope of an inheritance years ago.

When I’m doing things – especially new and interesting things, I feel better and go days at a time without ever thinking about my health problems – less time to dwell on self pity. It works for me.

axman

Medical Science, Black Magic, and Dumb Luck

2010-04-11T12:23:00.000-07:00

Prostate Cancer Treatment in the 21st Century

I follow a few blogs, medical sites, and government sites that focus on prostate cancer. As an old geezer with incurable (but not untreatable) prostate cancer I am looking for hope and progress – something credible that might slow growth, shrink tumors, kill cancer cells, and let me live happily ever after. There are a lot articles and anecdotal stories that tout green tea or pomegranate juice or some drug not yet approvedas a miracle cure. It does appear that more men are living longer – that’s good.

But, there does not seem to be a cure on the horizon – guys keep dying while waiting for something to happen. Every once in a while somebody claims to be totally cured after suffering for six or sixteen years, or their macrobiotic diet shrunk their tumor to nothing, or eating flax seeds while living in clean mountain air has lowered their PSA from 842 to 1.2.

My PSA has stayed about the same for the two years I have been on hormone therapy, but all the data points to a time when the hormones will no longer slow prostate cancer cell growth. Nobody seems to know why it works for two years for some guys and 10 years for others. I’m hoping for 10 years – or more.

Answers would be nice. Even knowing the right questions would help. For now I can more or less accept my role of keeping on keeping on. Let me know if YOU have either good questions or good answers.

axman

The PSA Test – to be or not to be

2010-04-01T07:52:00.000-07:00

What’s a guy to do?

In recent weeks and months there has been a lot written and said about the PSA (prostate specific antigen) test that men have been getting for several decades to help detect prostate cancer.

Some doctors and researchers are condemning the test as useless or even harmful and others defend it. What should us poor guys (who need the information) do? I’m way past the diagnosis part but I get PSA tests every three months to help determine the amount of hormone therapy I get. That seems to work for me.

Opponents say that PSA tests result in a lot of unnecessary treatments – surgery, radiation, freezing, and other options. And those treatments can lead to impotence and incontinence. That’s true - those side effects do happen. Common sense and patience might help. The PSA test is less than perfect but what is plan B? Nobody seems to know.

Increased PSA doesn’t necessarily mean you have prostate cancer. But results can provide information you need to weigh future decisions about your condition.

If you have never had a PSA test, check out organizations that you trust for more information and certainly talk to your doctor. What do the experts say? Check out the Mayo Clinic and American Cancer Society guidelines. They’ve changed over the years. Whatever their recommendations are you and your doctor will still need to talk and decide.

Mayo Clinic – PSA Guidelines http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/prostate-cancer/HQ01273.

American Cancer Society – New PSA Guidelines http://www.cancer.org/docroot/NWS/content/NWS_1_1x_Revised_Prostate_Cancer_Screening_Guidelines_What_Has--and_Hasnt--Changed.asp.

I’ve had many PSA tests and will probably have many more. Every man has to look at all the options and decide for himself. What do YOU think?

axman

In the Spring an Old Man’s Fancy Turns to Thoughts of…

2010-03-21T21:38:00.000-07:00

Sore knees, malfunctioning plumbing, setting new goals, and, of course, the good old days

After several years of almost daily walking and hiking but very little running, I’m starting to run again. …just a couple of miles every other day so far but hopefully it will build and lead to completing a marathon by next fall. That’s if everything goes well.

I tire more easily than I did even four or five years ago. Maybe it’s because of my cancer; maybe it’s due to my age; maybe it’s a combination of the two plus a few physical disparities. On obvious problem is my knee – with all the cartilage removed in 2006.

So, as I see it:
Job 1 – get these old bones and muscles back in shape – lungs too
Job 2 – baby that knee so it doesn’t grind and scrape too much. And be gentle with those herniated disks in my back
Job 3 – combine the results of job 1 and job 2 into a completed marathon in my 70th year.

Why am I doing this? Honestly I suppose there are several factors; ego, self identity, stubbornness, or maybe just stupidity (that’s my wife’s conclusion). I’ve completed more than 75 marathons and ultra-marathons and I always enjoyed the challenge. I ran pretty fast in some of them (won a few) and pretty slow in others. One more would feel good – another personal goal met.

My last marathon was in Stockholm (the one in Sweden) in 2005 and it took me well over five hours – more than double my best times in the foggy past. But I can live with slow – not that I have much choice. Stay tuned…

axman

Living Life Three-Months at a Time

2010-03-11T13:26:00.000-08:00

Maybe three month segments aren’t so bad…

My life is arranged around when I see my various and sundry doctors. Over a period of several years I have managed to get all my appointments set for a one-week period every three months. That leaves two and a half months to travel, camp, read, write, and totally forget my trials and tribulations – mostly.

I have long believed – but not necessarily practiced – that worrying about my physical ailments does absolutely no good. Over the past couple of years I have noticed that I rarely think about the progression of my prostate cancer or arthritis or even senility (I forget that I might be senile) when I don’t have a pending doctor’s appointment. Then, about a week before I see my doctors I do a quick check to see if I’m still alive and functional.

Most of my medical consultations are rather boring:
“What hurts – on a scale from one to ten?”
“Things haven’t changed much – that’s probably good.”
“Here’s your prescription.”
“See you in about three months – if I’m not on vacation then.”

Then, for almost three more months, I’m free (and healthy in my own mind) again. And my circle of medical life goes on and on. Does this kind of thing happen to you, too?

Axman

In With the New

2010-03-01T21:43:00.000-08:00

…but not necessarily OUT with the old…

We just completed the drive from sort of sunny Arizona to sort of cold and wet Idaho to see our new grandson – our sixth grandchild. As expected – at three days old he was tiny, loud, strong, and of course perfect.

What will he face when he grows up? I won’t know about a lot of his life. Will he look like me? And will he inherit my genetic link to prostate cancer? Surely there will be a cure by the time he may need it – 40 or 50 or 60 years from now. A cure four or five or six months from now would be good, too.

Helping to care for a newborn put some things in perspective;

1 I’m not really in charge – no adult is – of this small human who does what he does regardless of how much we all try to do the right thing and manage his life.

2 He sleeps when he’s ready and lets everyone know when he’s decided its time to eat – or not to eat.

3 Our best intentions may result in screaming and flailing limbs or he may cuddle and sleep for hours – it’s not totally predictable.

4 He does seem to have mastered sucking, pooping, and peeing – on his schedule.

As the grandpa, I can always hand him back to Mom and Dad when all else fails. Strangely I don’t remember a lot about the difficult times when my kids were babies – maybe because my wife did most of the hard work.

The cycle of life continues...

axman

A Leged in My Own Mind

2010-02-20T10:08:00.000-08:00

…how do I want to be remembered - is there even a choice?

When I was a kid growing up way out in the country, I knew a lot of older men who seemed ancient to me at the time – wrinkled, bald, fat, and sometimes crippled. I was told these guys were war heroes, ex-major league ballplayers, and bi-plane pilots. In my adolescent mind this wasn’t possible. Old duffers were always old duffers; they couldn’t possibly have been young and strong and brave in some past life.

Now I’m older than they were when I knew them. And even though I fit the description from above (wrinkled, fat, bald, and gimpy) I still remember the time when I was young and strong and adventurous. But how do my grandkids (and maybe great-grandkids) see me? Could they even imagine what I was like 25 or 40 or 60 years ago? Probably not.

Will they even know what it means to work your way through college? Would they believe I actually ran all those marathons and ultra marathons? And how could I have survived without HD TV, computers, cell phones, iPods, and especially wifi?

I guess the solution is: don’t worry about it, be happy. Keep doing what I do now. And accept the fact that I will be remembered as a strange old man and not the Greek God I would have like to have been in my wild, impetuous youth. My youngest grandchild was just born - what will he think of his old grandma and grandpa? Don't ask...

axman

Afraid of Dying?

2010-02-10T09:17:00.000-08:00

…just about everybody is if they’re being honest and paying attention

Most of my life I never gave a second thought to death or dying unless somebody I knew died. That changed slightly the day I was diagnosed with cancer. Even then it was more strange than frightening. In recent years several close friends have died from long-term diseases including a variety of cancers. I was impressed at how calm, accepting, and unafraid they were.

In my experience, there seems to be a progression of views and beliefs in life.

At 20 I assumed I would live forever and never lose any kind of functioning. For a while that seemed to be the case.

At 50 I felt strong and still indestructible – even though I remember that I considered my parents old when THEY were 50.

At 70 (almost) I have come to accept mortality (sort of). But there is a lot I still want to do. My bucket list is long. I have slowed down some (OK, more than some) and there are more aches and pains than a few years ago. My prostate cancer is under control, for now, and my arthritis and other aches and pains are mainly annoyances.

My mind (this, of course, may not seem to be true to anyone who knows me) seems to be OK most of the time – if you don’t count forgetting lots of things.

I am less patient with long waits for medical appointments, slow payment of insurance claims, rudeness from people who SHOULD be helping me, and people assuming I am stupid just because I’m old and gray. I’ve learned to say things like, “Let me talk to your supervisor”, and “No, that’s NOT OK”!

So I’m just going to get on with it (it being living the way I want) and see what happens.

Axman

Excess Thinking May be Hazardous

2010-01-31T09:06:00.000-08:00

…to Your Mental Health; so most of us should not be at risk

It’s good to be busy. That doesn’t necessarily mean accomplishing anything; just being on the move, reading, puttering; something other that just staring at the wall or ceiling or TV.

My wife and I are blessed with lots to do (she feels more blessed than I do, however). There’s always something to fix or change around the house, we go camping, traveling, visiting kids and grandkids, and jeeping - we feel pretty good most of the time. And we find that we don’t have time to worry too much – more than we’d like, but it’s manageable.

We’ve noticed that many, but not all, our geriatric contemporaries agree with us. When we suggest activities or invite to some of them to go someplace we often get answers like:

“Camping? Nah; too dirty and dusty and we'd probably get bitten or stung. You go and tell us about it later. I think we’ll just take it easy at home.”

“Travel outside the U.S? Nah, the plane might crash, we could get a disease, the food is probably tainted, and those foreign people over there talk funny! I think we’ll watch a special on the National Geographic channel instead.”

“Go out to Dinner? I think not. Why not just have a pizza delivered and not have to bother with dressing up and getting through all that traffic. Why leave the comfort of home if you don’t have to?”

Thinking about what to do (more likely what not do), how many aches and pains you have, the next horrible diagnosis, or the state of the economy might be useful, but if all you do is think and worry and procrastinate… that’s probably not so healthy.

axman

It’s Pills, Pills, Pills…

2010-01-21T17:06:00.000-08:00

That’ll Cure Our Ills

I don’t see myself as a pill popper, but when I count up all the pills I take each day it appears that I am. I’m not alone! Pills are supposed to keep us healthy, prevent disease, and keep us alive when all else fails. So why do YOU take pills?

To numb our pains we all take pills.

For the upset from pain pills – more pills.

To manage cancer we take bunches of pills.

To manage the cancer pills we still take pills.

Of course if you can’t sleep – it’s pills.

Then to wake up and be alert we need pills.

If we’re lucky we get generic pills.

If not we swallow Name Brand pills.

Sometimes there’s a chance to get experimental pills.

Then there are ‘make water’ pills.

And ‘stop making water’ pills.

To start your heart you may need pills.

And to slow it down, take different pills.

After eating we take ‘full stomach’ pills.

Before eating it’s the ‘empty stomach’ pills.

So all our ills are treated with pills.

Or maybe those ills are caused by pills.

I’d write more but it’s time to take my pills.

axman

The Benefits of Winter Sun

2010-01-10T08:44:00.001-08:00

…if you can find some

One of the many benefits of retirement is the opportunity to choose my own climate of residence. Each winter we try to spend a month or two in a place that’s warmer and dryer than western Oregon. So far - so good.

Spring, Summer, and Fall are tolerable most anywhere but Winter is a season of a different color. Fog, rain, ice, clouds, and short days are not high on my pleasure meter.

So, we try to spend a month or two in a warmer climate each winter – Arizona most of the time. It’s not perfect – nights are cold and the wind blows a bit – but overall 70 degree days and lots of clear skies tip the scales for me.

And don’t forget the health benefits of sunshine and vitamin D and such. I have to admit, however, that the major benefit is mental! Somehow waking up to sunshine, daily walks without rain, sitting in the sun, and picnics in January improve my outlook. From my wife’s point of view that means I’m less grumpy and that improves her mental outlook. That’s a two-fer.

axman

Bring on Those Magical Cures!

2009-12-31T04:10:00.000-08:00

When prostate cancer keeps coming back…

Logic, science, medical expertise, and common sense be damned; there comes a time when all that remains is faith, dumb luck, or magic.

So, we try the mud baths, salt water enemas, massive doses of Vitamin C or B, 20 cups of green tea each day, and even those hallucinatory mushrooms. And if it seems to work – even a little – we consider it a miracle.

When many types of cancer (such as prostate) come back after a shot or two at a cure, the rest of your time is spent being a ‘survivor’. “I’m still surviving; still alive.” That survival might be a few months or many years or somewhere in between.

If you want to know more about ‘miracle cures’ just go online. Google ‘non traditional cancer cures’ or ‘curing your own cancer’ or just ‘cancer cures’ and you’ll find hundreds of individual anecdotal miracles. “How Potato Peels Purified my Prostate” or “How Bungee Jumping Cured My Cancer.” Are any of these stories true? Is there any scientific evidence? Probably. Probably not. Maybe. Nobody knows. Everybody’s cancer is different from every body else’s.

Would I try a magical mystery cure? If the time and circumstances were right – yeah, probably.

Besides, I believe in magic.

axman

Prostate Cancer don’t get NO Respect

2009-12-19T09:12:00.000-08:00

Sick Old Men Unite!

There are numerous runs, walks, auctions, pledge drives, dinners, and T shirt sales to support research and treatment for breast cancer. That’s as it should be, of course.

But where are the public relations people and events when it comes to prostate cancer? What’s the matter with all you guys with prostate cancer? Are you shy, indifferent, or embarrassed? Do you truly believe that real men DON’T (or shouldn’t) get prostate cancer? Yes they do (read Real Men Get Prostate Cancer Too – http://www.axmaker.com/ and convince yourself)! Big hairy bikers, iron pumpers, CEOs, vegans, pilots, bowlers, marathon runners, accountants, and even lawyers (as if anybody cares) do get prostate cancer.

One reason for prostate cancer’s seeming lack of public popularity is almost certainly men’s reluctance to discuss anything personal - and another reason may be that your prostate doesn’t show (do you know where your prostate is tonight?). Whether or not you have a prostate doesn’t do much to change your appearance (at least on the outside).

So speak up, educate people, and do your part to make sure that research continues to look for better treatments and even a cure!
axman

I Don’t Want to Live Forever…

2009-12-07T18:19:00.000-08:00

…but just a little longer would be nice

Every part of our bodies wears out, short circuits, or ceases to function sooner or later. It doesn’t happen at the same rate for everybody. You know people who look and act years younger than their biological age – and you know some relatively young people who act old and decrepit. Of course we all see ourselves as looking younger than our real age…

Aging sneaks up on you. You’re joints get stiffer in the morning, you get a cramp after your walk, there’s a new pain in your shoulder, and don’t forget the arthritis in your hands. Then there is the need for stronger and thicker glasses every couple of years, a hearing aid (mostly its that others mumble more), and trying to save those few remaining teeth.

Your heart, your strongest muscle, seldom lasts more than a century or so, livers do better without too much alcohol (a little wine might even be beneficial I tell myself), and your lungs don’t much like smoke. And who knows when you might get hit by a bus!

We cope by making small adjustments, then larger ones; from there it's relying on medications, and often more serious treatments like surgery, chemotherapy, or getting new parts. As a last resort we look for miracle cures (as if surviving this long hasn’t been a miracle) – it all seems to be part of the plan.

axman

The Most Unpleasant Side Effects

2009-11-26T11:59:00.000-08:00

…Still Slightly Better Than Being Dead

I routinely complain about the side effects from my surgery, radiation, and medications. But the fact is I am more than willing to endure the fatigue, weight gain, strange growths, hot flashes, and pain – as long as I can stay vertical or at least above ground. Surviving trumps lots of other stuff; no matter what others may tell you.

Time, research, and improved medications are resulting in fewer side effects – or so I’m told by highly educated medical practitioners. At the present time I’m still alive and more or less able to lead a normal life. Normal for an old duffer anyway... And I can use my current side effects as an excuse to avoid working in the garden and cleaning out the gutters (please don’t tell my wife).

I’m betting that all my elderly friends who bemoan the strange side effects they’re coping with wouldn’t trade those side effects for a pine box – just yet. Senior life, living with incurable diseases, and normal wear and tear requires choices and compromises – and a little hell-raising if you’re lucky. I am.

axman

A Morbid Curiosity with the Latest Cancer Research

2009-11-15T20:07:00.000-08:00

…as if it made any difference

I subscribe to several email and Blog programs that send daily updates on all sorts of cancer research – and I read them all. Then there are the medical journal reports, Cancer Center articles, and anecdotal information. Reading all this stuff probably doesn’t make me even a little bit healthier. Even if there is a miracle cure in there someplace I’d probably get hopelessly confused by the medical gobbledygook.

All the headlines accentuate the positive: Mice with Prostate Cancer Treated with XTZ666 Live 27% Longer than Control Group, or New Chemo Cocktail Shows Promise, or Exploitation Drugs Ltd to Unveil Revolutionary Prostate Drug! As good as these headlines sound there isn’t any real information in there.

If I had not read any of those articles or studies nothing in my life would be much different – except for knowing a lot more about cancer ridden mice. I wonder if someone notifies the next-of-kin mouse.

So should we all read everything we can find – fact or fiction – about our particular disease? Will it help? Nobody knows.

I will likely continue my obsessive search for cancer information – I guess it’s in my nature. You, on the other hand, may be emotionally healthier than I am and able to resist the urge.

axman

Sometimes a Lumpy Boob is Just a Lumpy Boob…

2009-11-05T10:42:00.000-08:00

The word boob is used here to denote an enlarged male breast and not the affectionate term my wife sometimes uses when referring to me.

My mammogram/manogram is now history. I discussed the basics along with my cartoon idea of the process in my October 10 Blog entry. I was right on – except the Mammo-Monster was smaller and slightly more innocent looking – and it didn’t talk to me.
The X-Ray Tech, Lisa (an altered name to protect the innocent and keep me from being sued), was calm, quiet, and gentle. Thank you! The process was slightly uncomfortable and required me to stand in some awkward positions but was much less traumatic than I had expected.
Some of my fellow patients in the Women’s Imaging Center waiting room may have been slightly surprised when the nurse called me in and left my wife sitting calmly and wishing me good luck.
Post-Gram I was visited by the Radiology Doc (and his lovely Intern) who explained, as he poked and probed, that I was cancer free – for now, but at increased risk from the hormones. The lovely young Intern seemed a bit uncomfortable as she was directed to check out my lumps (I’d use the word fondle but I may be fantasizing).
So now it’s back to worrying about prostate cancer and letting my breasts bounce where they may.
axman

Go to a Prostate Cancer Conference, Old Man

2009-10-25T16:54:00.000-07:00

I recently attended a large prostate cancer conference at OHSU in Portland, Oregon. There were about 100 people in attendance – mostly old men with prostate cancer (like me) and their significant others (like my wife). The day-long affair consisted of short presentations by doctors from a variety of prostate cancer backgrounds – surgery, radiation, research, nutrition, and new treatments. There was a lot to learn.

The good parts:
· There was a lot of information and handouts and slides
· Some presenters were articulate, clever, supportive, and even inspiring
· Everyone was allowed to ask questions in an informal atmosphere
· There was more than adequate coffee, snacks, and lunch
· Rest rooms were large and nearby – a very good perk

The other parts:
· Some presentations were techno-babble heavy and hard to follow – Doc Talk was abundant
· There was little about “What might help us guys with prostate cancer right now”
· Much of the focus was five or ten years down the road – we don’t all have ten years…

Bottom Line:
It was worthwhile and I’ll go again next year. You can check out a complete video of the proceedings by going to: http://www.ohsucancer.com/index.asp?fuseaction=prostate.conference.
Check it out – you might learn something. You can fast forward through the parts you’re not interested in.
axman

The Ever Popular Man-O-Gram

2009-10-10T14:56:00.000-07:00

Of all the things I though would never happen to me, a mammogram was near the top of the list. It was listed right after giving birth and having a hysterectomy. In doing my homework I found that when a man is involved the test is whimsically called a Man-O-Gram.

My breasts have grown steadily since I started hormone therapy more than a year ago. They’re tender, too. Maybe that’s too much information.

Every year a few thousand men have mammograms and a few hundred are diagnosed with breast cancer. My oncologist recommended I get a mammogram because of growing lumps or mass in my breasts – most likely caused by my hormone therapy, but… I discovered that some Imaging Centers won’t even accept male patients. My referral specifies the “Women’s Imaging Center”.

You’d think I’d get a little pity from my wife. Nope. Just, “Now you’ll know what it feels like!” And I will. I’ll share more after the deed is done. Nothing is impossible and never say never – I’m learning.
axman

Ego, Physical Decline, and Self Worth

2009-10-01T08:23:00.000-07:00

I ain’t as good as I used to be. But then, few of us are...and maybe I never was!

Whether you’re healthy, relatively healthy, or ravaged with disease you will be going through a physical and probably mental decline if you live long enough. Whoopee! Getting your strokes by being faster, smarter, or more successful than somebody else doesn’t last forever. New parameters are needed – like being happy with still being alive.

Sometimes I sit around with my geriatric buddies and we inevitably get to talking about the good-old-days. Ironically, I used to make fun of my parents, aunts, and uncles when they did the same thing. Now, good-old-days means when I could do the things I did as well as I could do them – at least in my mind. Maybe it’s a matter of, “The older I get the better I was.”

There is some comfort in reminiscing about the past – it takes your mind off the trials and tribulations you’re dealing with in the present.

I’m not advocating living in the past. Carpe Diem! I enjoy living in the present – most of the time. Do what you can for as long as you can. Of course it would be nice to be young and strong and fast and have more hair - again.

Now that there are so many things I can no longer do I need to focus more on what I still can do. There must be something - besides writing a blog, that is. As long as I have loving (more or less) friends, kids, grandkids, and a tolerant wife, life is still pretty good. Different - but good. Painful - but good. Slower - but good.
axman

Setting a GOOD Example in those Declining Years

2009-09-23T12:10:00.000-07:00

Or not… Since I published my book I have met with a dozen or so small groups of men and their wives to discuss prostate cancer, their survival, my survival, and of course my book. The groups are generally small (often really small) and the talk is very interactive – with others asking questions and making comments as I proceed. It’s all very calm and relaxed.

More often than not the questions sound like, “What should I do?” “What’s the best treatment?” “Does my Doctor know what he’s talking about?” “You must know what works – so share it with us!”

I really don’t know what they should do (except to buy and read my book). Sometimes they think I’m withholding information from them. After all, I have prostate cancer and I wrote a book so I must be an expert. Don’t I wish…

I tell than that if I knew of a cure for prostate cancer I would first cure myself and then share that information with the rest of the world – for a small fee, of course.

What I can do, and try to do, is to live my life the way I say that I do (in the book and during the talks). Whatever it is that I do must be working at least a little - I’m still alive. Basically that consists of good nutrition, staying active, keeping a positive outlook (most of the time), and thinking pure thoughts (OK, probably not the pure thoughts part). I’m not a saint, not even a little bit saintly, and would not recommend that anybody emulate me – unless they came to that conclusion after checking things out for themselves.

Men with prostate cancer should (probably) get as much information as possible, make choices based on their best judgment, and be willing to change direction if something doesn’t work. As far as I can determine, nobody knows for sure what anybody with prostate cancer should do.

axman

Men and Doctors – Keeping One from the Other

2009-09-12T08:19:00.001-07:00

I’ve never known a man who would willingly go to see his doctor unless blood was gushing from a manly wound someplace. We all know it’s a good idea to get checkups, vaccinations, and prescriptions from time to time. But I put off doctor visits until my wife yells at me (inducing greater fear than seeing the doctor) and sometimes (usually) she even calls to make the appointment.

Most of the women I know make regular doctor appointments, write them down, and then actually show up at the appointed time. They don’t even make a big deal about it. Rumor has it that women (in general) live longer than men (in general). Could there be a connection between seeing a doctor and living longer? Nahhhh.

Don’t get me wrong, I get along just fine with my doctors. I even like them. I see four or five different physicians from time to time. Not one of them has ever mistreated me, lectured me, or even pointed and laughed. Maybe it comes down to some primordial need or urge to be manly and take care of myself. Or it may be inherent stubbornness or laziness – more likely. My wife would agree with all these reasons.

axman

Get 'er Done!

2009-09-03T11:36:00.000-07:00

Rule #1 of Retirement: If you can do it yourself - you MUST!

Well, that's more my wife's rule than mine, but there is this mindset that as time gets shorter you hurry faster to get it all (whatever all means) done.

This summer we needed a new roof over the back deck and new siding on the house. You'd think that your average decrepit, sickly, elderly couple could find a younger and smarter and stronger handyman (or handywoman) eager for the job. After a brief (very brief) discussion we decided that we could easily do it by ourselves over the course of the summer. How hard could it be? And we'd save a bundle of money!

But the real reason we choose to do it may have more to do with that dratted work ethic instilled in us by our depression-era parents and grandparents. Hard work is good for the soul! Even though it may not be so good for the rest of the body.

It took two or three weeks to complete most of the work and probably double that to heal. Next comes the painting - yup, we're doing that part, too. At least paint is less dangerous than skill saws, electric drills, and hammers - if you don't inhale too often. And there IS that feeling of satisfaction, impressing the neighbors, and owning the family bragging rights; "Look what WE did during our summer vacation!" Nobody seems all that impressed and a few brave souls even asked why on earth we didn't get somebody else to do it.

I've noticed that quite a few of our geezer friends, some of them in much worse health than we are, still feel the need and obligation to do all their own repairs and building and painting and mechanical work. Maybe we'll make a smarter decision next time - but not likely.

axman

Q - How Many Body Parts can Hurt at the Same Time? A - LOTS

2009-08-25T09:47:00.000-07:00

It has come to my attention that the number of body parts that exude pain at any given time is gradually increasing as my age gradually increases. You may be experiencing the same thing.

A few hours of yardwork can lead to several days of sore knees, back pain a 'crick' in my neck, and hands that ache and won't respond to normal directions from my brain.

I know that all those things come with advancing age. But what about the effects of my cancer and cancer meds? According to my doctors (more than one) the pains don't have much to do with the cancer - yet. As a matter of fact my urologist told me, "What do you expect; you're 69 years old!" He always manages to say something to make me feel better (or not).

My day is usually better if I start off in the hot tub, walk a couple miles, and limit strenuous labor (involvling hammers and saws and chain saws and hauling fireplace wood) to a few hours a day - and not every day, That way I can better manage my pains such as sore knees, back pain a 'crick' in my neck, and hands that ache .

Feeling pain tells me I'm still alive - and most of the time that's a good thing.

axman

Oh No! It's Back! Not Fair!

2009-08-18T09:36:00.000-07:00

My PSA started to increase almost immediately after my prostatectomy in 2003. So other than the immediate shock, anger, and feeling sorry for myself, I have lived with the reality of recurring prostate cancer from the start.

In the past several months two old (with prostate cancer the 'old' part goes without saying) friends who underwent treatment five and eight years ago discovered that their PSA had started rising again. In fact their PSA had doubled every several months for quite a while. Both thought they were cured. For years their PSA had been near zero. They were sure they were cured.

When confronted with 'recurrence' they were understandably devastated. This happens to thousands of men every year - recurrence after five or ten or more years of being cancer free.

Being diagnosed with prostate cancer 'again' can be more emotionally difficult than being diagnosed the first time.

"It can't be happening again!"

"It must be a mistake!"

"I'm going to check with another doctor - one who will get it right!"

"I'm sure it will be OK when I get re-tested next month."

"OMG, I'm gonna die!!"

What can You Do?

First of all, stay calm. In the world of prostate cancer there is usually no reason to hurry up and take action. There are many treatments and the options vary depending on what treatment or treatments you had originally. Surgery or radiation or radioactive seeds might be options if they were not done previously. Hormone therapy may be appropriate. Or maybe your oncologist will recommend watchful waiting - at least for a while. There is bound to be SOMETHING you and your doctor can agree on. Don't panic. Don't rush to do something before you think it through. Keeping a positive attitude (not always easy) may be the best therapy of all.

axman

To Pee or Not to Pee...

2009-08-03T11:40:00.000-07:00

...that is the question. Of course you recognize that line from the famous Shakespeare "Prostatectomy" soliloquy - or maybe not. But the question is relevant to anyone who has had one or more prostate cancer treatments in the past.

You've no doubt seen some of the numerous late-night TV ads for men who have trouble with urination (enlarged prostate/BPH). They tout all sorts of pills and liquids and ointments to make passing water easier. Us men who have been treated for prostate cancer have no such problems. As a matter of fact you can probably go pee any time you want - and sometimes when you don't.

After six years of various treatments - ranging from surgery to radiation to hormone pills - I have had reason to be concerned. Even though I long ago decided that living in a diaper was better than being dead without one, I did NOT want to go in that direction.

The bad news: You probably know that your likelihood of incontinence increases in the years after treatment.

The good news: There are some things you can do to improve your odds, so don't give up hope. I didn't.

For years I have done Kegel exercises (when I could remember) and that probably did help. More recently my Urologist prescribed some pills to relax my bladder. How could that help, I asked? He said that sometimes a more relaxed bladder makes it easier to control those unintended leaky moments. After a month I saw no difference, but after six months there has been a major improvement. It could all be psychological but that's OK, too. And I have a relaxed bladder - assuming that's a good thing!
axman

Think I'll Take a Nap

2009-07-29T18:24:00.000-07:00

Every couple days I get the urge to take a nap. I don't necessarily want to take a nap - it makes me feel like the old Grandpas you see on TV snoring away in their rocking chairs. It tarnishes my self-defined macho image.
My Doctor assures me (or reassures me) it's just that I'm old as dirt (almost 69). That's true, of course, but I don't actually feel that old.
Fatigue is listed as a possible side effect for each of my several medications. Now that's something I'm more willing to believe.
And there's the possibility that it's the biological process of my ancient immune system fighting off the Prostate Cancer that tires me out a bit.
Whatever it is, my energy level is definitely below par (at least below what I want it to be). It could be that the old geezer nap might not be such a bad idea after all - maybe. I'll let you know.
What is your experience with fatigue - and overcoming it? Let me know.
axman

More About Clinical Trials

2009-07-17T18:24:00.000-07:00

Back on April 8th I talked a little about my experience with clinical trials. I'm doing some research on who particpates in clinical trials - or more likely who is NOT participating. Fewer than 5% of those with cancer ever join a clinical trial.

Why don't people participate? Nobody knows for sure but there are some interesting survey restults. More men than women participate - a bit of a surprise because women are much more likely to seek medical treatment. About half of those doctors surveyed reported not even telling their patients about clinical trials. They cited being uncomfortable about discussing trials as a major reason. You may have to ask THEM!

Some people who know about trials opt not to participate - everybody has that choice. Some Health Insurance carriers refuse to pay for any cancer treatment if you are participating in a clinical trial. In about half of all states there are laws that now require Health Insurance carriers to pay for 'normal' treatment costs that would occur whether or not you were in a clinical trial. Medicare (if you're covered) pays for most regular treatment costs if you participate in a Clinical Trial.

Some trials have been cancelled because they couldn't get enough participants. That delays approval of potentially helpful drugs.

I definitely want any drug that might help me to be tested and approved if it actually works. So if you're so inclined and eligible - at least think about participating.

The NIH (National Institutes of Health) has a comprehensive site listing trials abailable all over the U.S. http://www.clinicaltrials.gov/ct2/results?term=cancer.

axman

Don't Read the Fine Print!!

2009-07-11T18:27:00.000-07:00

Like many of you, I've been taking several medications to "manage" my prostate cancer for a while now. There are dozens of drugs in several categories that are supposed to slow prostate cancer growth in strange and unique ways. That's old news.

If you have a slightly perverse mind - like me - spend an entertaining half hour googling your meds and checking out the Side Effects section (sometimes called contraindications). No matter what the drug, there will be a list of possible side effects as long as your arm - it's required by law.

After reading about the possibility of hot flashes, constipation, incontinence, diarrhea, cramps, swelling, headaches, weight gain, memory loss, and impaired vision it seems I might be better off with the cancer than the side effects! My oncologist says different but HE isn't taking my pills. But to tell it like it is, I haven't actually experienced MOST of the possible side effects.

So, I have decided (for now) to ignore those lists until I actually experience a contraindication or two.
axman

Watch Out for that BUS!

2009-07-04T15:04:00.000-07:00

Just after I found out my prostate cancer had 'recurred' after the surgery to end all surgeries and cure me forever, I was feeling pretty sorry for myself. Why me? It's not fair! I'm going to die a horrible death! My urologist didn't seem so upset. I was just one of 50,000 American men who was diagnosed with recurrent prostate cancer every year.

He told me, "Don't worry, you'll probably get hit by a bus before your prostate cancer kills you." Somehow that was reassuring. Nobody knows what will happen next. I actually could get hit by a bus tomorrow or I might live to 97. Men with prostate cancer die every day of all sorts of reasons other than prostate cancer. And most men with prostate cancer survive every day.

All I can do is get up every morning and do something I want to do and then repeat the process tomorrow morning. Easier said than done, but my level of anxiety is much reduced over these six years even though I still have prostate cancer and it is relentlessly, but slowly, progressing.

So I do what I can, try not to worry about what I can't control, and I stay far away from rogue busses. So far - so good!

axman

Just When You Thought...

2009-06-23T14:36:00.000-07:00

...you could trust your oncologist, an article turned up in the NY Times that may cause you to be more cautious. Check this out at the Zero Cancer website http://www.zerocancer.org/site/News2?page=NewsArticle&id=10874. At a VA Hospital in Philadelphia there were serious errors in 92 of 116 treatments when radioactive seeds (brachytherapy) were inserted into the prostate (supposedly) of men expecting professional prostate cancer treatment. Seeds were actually injected into the colon, bladder, and other areas instead of the prostate. There have been serious and painful side effects.
This whole process took place over more than six years and nothing was done to intervene or protect the patients who were put at risk during that time.

Why do I include this here? I'm not trying to scare you; only to strongly suggest that you don't make hasty decisions. Talk to doctors, patients, friends, and clergy. Check hospital and doctor reviews online. Read the blogs and medical journals and reliable websites. While most doctors and hospitals and treatments are high quality you want to be sure.

The best treatment is what we all deserve. Demand it and expect it and let your doctor and hospital and insurance carrier know when that doesn't happen.
axman

Waiting for Symptoms

2009-06-13T16:37:00.000-07:00

I am convinced most men (including me) operate in a state of denial at least part of the time. In my discussions with guys who have prostate cancer and those who's wives think they might be at risk there is a common thread: "I'll go see a doctor as soon as I have some symptoms." "What symptoms?" I ask. Many of these guys are convinced (or want to be) that anything as serious as prostate cancer would definitely have some warning signs. Pain or difficulty in urinating would be symptom number one. No pain - no disease.
If only... In fact (and most men know this deep down someplace) prostate cancer usually has NO early signs, signals, or symptoms. It would be nice to have symptoms BEFORE going to a doctor. If you go for a prostate cancer exam and DON'T have prostate cancer are you a wuss? Would Real Men and Real Women point and laugh? ...they might anyway, but that's another story.
Six years after my initial diagnosis and subsequent treatments I still haven't had even ONE small symptom that might be connected with my prostate cancer. Not one. And that's the norm.
Bottom line? Don't wait for symptoms. Be a wuss and get a checkup now and then.

axman

Bucket Lists

2009-06-06T11:23:00.000-07:00

A couple years ago, when it became obvious that my prostate cancer and my wife's diabetes were not going to get much better or go away, we made some not-so-difficult decisions:

We were going to spend our kid's inheritance (the stock market has been amazingly helpful in this)

We were going to do as many things and go as many places as possible (bad backs and poor memories be damned)

We were going to spend time with kids and grandkids and friends (as long as they could put up with us)

We were going to read books and drink wine and take naps (so far so good).

When I shared this sort-of philosophy with some of my prostate cancer survivor friends, they didn't necessarily share my goals. In fact, several of them had an almost-opposite goal: stay home, relax, enjoy what you have, and fade away gracefully. It made me think a little (I didn't want to overdo it) - everybody has their own idea of what their retirement years should include. Fair enough. Just make sure you actually make a decision. Don't just let time slip and slide away and then wonder where it all went...
Do what YOU want to do before you "kick the bucket."
axman

Positive Attitudes - Bah Humbug

2009-05-31T20:54:00.000-07:00

I keep running into guys with prostate cancer - I actually seek them out. My mercenary side tries to sell them a book or two. My warm and fuzzy side wants to share information on the secrets of survival.

To a man, they seem genuinely optimistic. "I'm figuring they'll find some better treatments in a year or two." "I feel better than I did six months ago!" "I'm not dead yet!"

I've even noticed subtle changes in my own skeptical, curmudgeonly life style. For a couple of years now I've made an effort to reconnect with old friends I hadn't seen in 20 or 30 years - or even more. The reunions have been great - even a little emotional sometimes. And, a high percentage of those old geezers have prostate cancer or some other cancer. Nobody ever complained; just shared. Maybe that cup is half full after all.

axman

And the BEST Treatment is…

2009-05-13T12:37:00.001-07:00

OK, OK, nobody really knows, but in a new research study there may be an indication – if you’re young enough. If you’re older than 50 when you’re diagnosed the jury is still out.

Researchers at Henry Ford Hospital in Detroit, Michigan reviewed more than 8,200 cases where men were diagnosed with prostate cancer before they were 50.

The Study in a Nutshell

"When given the choice between surgery, watchful waiting or external beam radiotherapy, patients younger than 50 with moderately and poorly differentiated prostate cancers have better long-term overall and cancer-specific survival when they opt for surgery," says study author Naveen Pokala, M.D., an urologist with Henry Ford Hospital.

In 5, 10, 15, and 20 year follow-ups those men who opted for radical prostatectomy had a better survival rate than those who received external beam radiation (X-ray) treatment or chose active surveillance (watch and wait).

So tell your younger friends (more and more ‘young’ men are being diagnosed) to check out this study if they are diagnosed and BEFORE they opt for treatment. Long term survival rates keep getting better and better. I consider that pretty good news now that my post-treatment recurrent prostate cancer is at six years and counting. I try to count very slowly.

axman

Losing Friends

2009-05-05T17:06:00.000-07:00

In the past few months I’ve lost some good friends – two of them to cancer and one to a senseless accident. Even though they’re gone I haven’t quite accepted it yet. Every so often something will happen and I’ll think, “I’ve gotta share that with…” Only then do I remember he’s gone.

In each case I was shocked and surprised; even though the two guys with cancer were in the later stages of the disease. But it can’t be – denial. Then sadness and concern for their families. And finally concern for myself. If it can happen to them…

I wish I’d had more time with them. And it strengthens my resolve to do the things I want to do and not wait until the weather’s better or I can afford it or I finish painting the house.

axman

Second Opinions? Why?

2009-04-23T07:54:00.001-07:00

I know, I know you’ve heard this a million times (well a lot anyway). “Always get a second opinion.” Is it necessary? If you get the same information the second time you may think it wasn’t necessary. But without more information how are you to know?

There are some benefits you might want to weigh…

The first diagnosis may be wrong. It could happen. PSA tests are not 100 percent reliable, DRE exams are not always reliable either. Without more information you may be making a decision that you could regret later.

A second opinion could suggest that, although you do have prostate cancer, no immediate treatment is necessary (watchful waiting).

Another doctor or another clinic may suggest more or different alternative treatments. Surgery, radiation, hormones, freezing, pellets… Of course that means more decisions for you.

And maybe a second exam and opinion would give you more peace of mind and support in making the very difficult decision about what you should do – and the decision IS yours.

How did you decide? What decisions are you contemplating now?

axman

Hereditary Guilt Complex

2009-04-14T16:58:00.000-07:00

If it's not bad enough to have an incurable disease of some sort; you can now worry about what you'll pass on to your kids - if you want to.

Shortly after I was diagnosed with prostate cancer I discovered that my sons were at increased risk for prostate cancer because I had it. My father was also diagnosed with prostate cancer.
My wife has diabetes and it is common in her family. Another genetic trait that can be passed on.

As it turns out, we can pass on all sorts of conditions, diseases, and predispositions to our kids. Does that mean we shouldn't have kids? Probably not. I have made sure that my three sons have had prostate cancer screening and one of them found he had a higher-than-usual PSA at age 38.

I hope none of my children get prostate cancer, diabetes, arthritis, or any of the other conditions they may inherit. And I hope none of the grandkids do either. I can encourage them to live healthy, get checkups, and pay attention to symptoms. The rest is up to them.

Maybe in another generation or two there will be medical breakthroughs that allow everybody to avoid genetically inherited diseases. In the meantime we all take our chances. I don't actually feel guilty but I wish my sons weren't at increased risk because of me. If I knew when I was 20 what I found out at 63 would I have even had kids? I don't know for sure but I probably would still have fathered a gaggle of kids.

Life is unpredictable, strange, and amazing.
axman

Look for the Good News

2009-04-09T15:14:00.000-07:00

My definition of health, happiness, and quality of life has undergone some significant changes over the past seven years. Since I was diagnosed with prostate cancer my health news has not been consistently good. There have been snippets of good news along with the progression of my recurrent cancer. This week I experienced one of those snippets of good news that has me smiling - at least for now.

Progressions - Good News has Many Definitions

Seven years ago - the good news was that I had NOT been diagnosed with prostate cancer and there was no possibility in my mind that I ever would be! I was invincible.

Six years ago - the good news was that my surgeon told me the tumor was encapsulated and the tumor and my cancer had been successfully removed. Survival is always good news.

Four years ago - the good news was that after 37 external beam radiation treatments my recurrent cancer was gone - again - and my PSA was near zero. And the sores and weakness would pass.

Two years ago - the good news was that I was accepted into a clinical trial that looked promising for slowing my ever-increasing PSA. Potential good news, anyway.

One year ago - the good news was that I started taking two hormone medications that almost immediately started to lower my PSA. Good news, but no cure.

One week ago - the good news was that my PSA was low enough that I could stop taking ONE of my hormone pills - for a while at least.

Next month - who knows? As long as my definition of Good News is flexible I can keep looking.

So now I'm happy to be as healthy as I am for as long as I can. The rules and the reality keep changing. I hope I can keep up. I'm sure I can.

axman

What About Clinical Trials?

2009-04-08T11:54:00.000-07:00

There are hundreds of thousands of men who have been diagnosed with prostate cancer. In many cases (like mine and maybe yours) there is no known cure. So what do you do next? Often the answer is to do nothing. That's not a very good answer.

Whatever the stage of your cancer there are probably clinical trials available that are testing new drugs or procedures. In most cases there is very little or no cost to you. But very few of us who have cancer ever participate in a clinical trial or clinical study. Why?

Maybe you don't know about the trials. Maybe your doctor recommends against them. In fact, only three to five percent of those with cancer ever participate in a clinical trial. A trial has no guarantees of success. Most trials are quite safe - the medications have been extensively tested for safety before they're ever tried on humans. But nobody knows what the ultimate results will be.

I have been in two clinical trials. Neither of them cured my prostate cancer or even slowed it down. But I'm glad I participated - I got free testing, I learned more about my own cancer, and I made contact with others going through what I was going through. And I'd participate in another if it looked promising.

Talk with your doctor and google Clinlical Trials with the name of your cancer. Find out what's available and then ask lots of questions. You have to apply and fill out endless forms, but you might get lucky and land in a study that tests the new super cancer drug. It could happen.

What is your experinece with clincial trials? What are your reservations?
axman

What's New in Prostate Cancer?

2009-04-01T11:13:00.000-07:00

The latest controversy in Prostate Cancer is whether or not men should even be tested - particularly using the PSA test. Recent published studies suggest that PSA testing is not all that accurate and may lead to unneeded treatment and the risk of serious side effects such as incontinence and impotence. And, the studies suggest, diagnosis and treatment may not extend your life anyway.

It is true that treatment (surgery, radiation, freezing, radioactive seeds) can lead to serious side effects. Most men who are diagnosed with prostate cancer do not die from prostate cancer. So is there any benefit in being diagnosed?

Being tested and/or diagnosed gives you some choices. You can always choose NOT to have treatment, but you might also choose to change your lifestyle, try a different diet, or look for alternative treatments.

Every man has to decide whether or not to be tested. It would be nice to know ahead of time whether you were at risk for a fast-growing tumor or if you would likely not even need treatment (watch and wait). If your father or brother has prostate cancer your risk is higher. If you are African American your risk is higher.

I was diagnosed with a fast growing tumor and had it removed. My cancer came back but I'm still alive. For me it was better to know and have a choice. I believe that I'm alive today because I had treatment. I have been able to manage my condition with medication, diet, weight management, and by remaining active. So far so good.
axman

What do you think? Write a response.

Welcome to the Axman Blog

2008-08-18T18:13:00.000-07:00

Real men with real prostate cancer are everywhere. But you already knew that. If you're over 50 you probably have noticed that many of your friends and co-workers have had one or more prostate cancer treatments. The good news is - prostate cancer usually progresses slowly. The bad news is - it often continues to progress even when you have treatment.

What has been happening with your cancer? Do you have an exercise regimen or strange dietary routine that might help others? How do you keep your attitude positive? Where do you get your information?

axman