Or could have
happened, should have happened, or didn’t happen
About half of all of us with incurable cancer (incurable means that it likely will kill
us someday) also have to deal with depression and anxiety. Actually, it’s not
so surprising.
In many cases there is a predictable progression of events
and often it doesn’t end well:
·
Doctor: You have cancer.
·
You: OMG, I’m going to die!
·
Doctor: Maybe not, there are treatments and
possibly a cure!
·
You: Oh boy, I’m going to be cured!
·
Doctor: Whoops, the treatment didn’t work
completely and the cancer came back. This time it’s not curable.
·
You: OMG, I’m going to die!
·
Doctor: Maybe, but there are treatments to slow
cancer growth and give you a better quality of life.
·
You: What’s the use? I’ll just wait for the
inevitable…, or
·
You: Then it’s time to finish off my bucket
list, visit friends, and write that memoir…
When it seems hopeless there is professional help, medications,
counseling, and support groups—but you have to make the choice whether or not to
get assistance.
How we react to a bad situation varies a lot. Nobody knows
how they will do it until it happens to them. We all have good days and bad
days—I definitely hope I have more good days. My approach for the past dozen
years with incurable prostate cancer has been to spend time with family and
friends, laugh a lot, stay very, very busy, write blogs and books (often
humorous—hopefully), and draw and publish hundreds of cancer-related cartoons.
I have tried not to offend anyone with cancer—but, I maybe take a shot or two
at doctors and drug companies—and bring a smile or little laughter into some
lives.
Some have thanked me and even asked to borrow the articles
and cartoons for use in other publications. A few others have become angry with
me and told me how inappropriate humor is when dealing with cancer. One person,
with late stage cancer, told me, “Cancer is not funny!” And suggested I not use
humor in communicating with others who have cancer, ever. Of course I know cancer
is not funny but I believe a sense of humor can help—it has helped me. Being able
to laugh at the ironies of growing old, the strange side effects from medications,
those body parts that don’t work very well anymore, and becoming more and more
dependent on doctors, pills, injections, and even Depends, makes me smile—at least
a little! I know that won’t be the case for everybody.
Nobody knows if the meds will stop working or we’ll get hit
by a bus or the big 9.5 earthquake will hit or…. So I’m trying to enjoy every
day and maybe help some others enjoy their days a little bit more. What works
best is probably different for each person‑‑find what works best for you. There
are many sources of information out there. There are numerous cancer organizations,
blogs, support groups, and publications. Find those that fit your needs,
beliefs, and comfort levels.
axman