Oh No! It's Back! Not Fair!

My PSA started to increase almost immediately after my prostatectomy in 2003. So other than the immediate shock, anger, and feeling sorry for myself, I have lived with the reality of recurring prostate cancer from the start.

In the past several months two old (with prostate cancer the 'old' part goes without saying) friends who underwent treatment five and eight years ago discovered that their PSA had started rising again. In fact their PSA had doubled every several months for quite a while. Both thought they were cured. For years their PSA had been near zero. They were sure they were cured.

When confronted with 'recurrence' they were understandably devastated. This happens to thousands of men every year - recurrence after five or ten or more years of being cancer free.

Being diagnosed with prostate cancer 'again' can be more emotionally difficult than being diagnosed the first time.

"It can't be happening again!"

"It must be a mistake!"

"I'm going to check with another doctor - one who will get it right!"

"I'm sure it will be OK when I get re-tested next month."

"OMG, I'm gonna die!!"

What can You Do?

First of all, stay calm. In the world of prostate cancer there is usually no reason to hurry up and take action. There are many treatments and the options vary depending on what treatment or treatments you had originally. Surgery or radiation or radioactive seeds might be options if they were not done previously. Hormone therapy may be appropriate. Or maybe your oncologist will recommend watchful waiting - at least for a while. There is bound to be SOMETHING you and your doctor can agree on. Don't panic. Don't rush to do something before you think it through. Keeping a positive attitude (not always easy) may be the best therapy of all.

axman

Watch Out for that BUS!

Just after I found out my prostate cancer had 'recurred' after the surgery to end all surgeries and cure me forever, I was feeling pretty sorry for myself. Why me? It's not fair! I'm going to die a horrible death! My urologist didn't seem so upset. I was just one of 50,000 American men who was diagnosed with recurrent prostate cancer every year.

He told me, "Don't worry, you'll probably get hit by a bus before your prostate cancer kills you." Somehow that was reassuring. Nobody knows what will happen next. I actually could get hit by a bus tomorrow or I might live to 97. Men with prostate cancer die every day of all sorts of reasons other than prostate cancer. And most men with prostate cancer survive every day.

All I can do is get up every morning and do something I want to do and then repeat the process tomorrow morning. Easier said than done, but my level of anxiety is much reduced over these six years even though I still have prostate cancer and it is relentlessly, but slowly, progressing.

So I do what I can, try not to worry about what I can't control, and I stay far away from rogue busses. So far - so good!

axman

Look for the Good News

My definition of health, happiness, and quality of life has undergone some significant changes over the past seven years. Since I was diagnosed with prostate cancer my health news has not been consistently good. There have been snippets of good news along with the progression of my recurrent cancer. This week I experienced one of those snippets of good news that has me smiling - at least for now.

Progressions - Good News has Many Definitions

• Seven years ago - the good news was that I had NOT been diagnosed with prostate cancer and there was no possibility in my mind that I ever would be! I was invincible.
  



• Six years ago - the good news was that my surgeon told me the tumor was encapsulated and the tumor and my cancer had been successfully removed. Survival is always good news.



• Four years ago - the good news was that after 37 external beam radiation treatments my recurrent cancer was gone - again - and my PSA was near zero. And the sores and weakness would pass.
  



• Two years ago - the good news was that I was accepted into a clinical trial that looked promising for slowing my ever-increasing PSA. Potential good news, anyway.
  



• One year ago - the good news was that I started taking two hormone medications that almost immediately started to lower my PSA. Good news, but no cure.
  



• One week ago - the good news was that my PSA was low enough that I could stop taking ONE of my hormone pills - for a while at least.



• Next month - who knows? As long as my definition of Good News is flexible I can keep looking.
  

So now I'm happy to be as healthy as I am for as long as I can. The rules and the reality keep changing. I hope I can keep up. I'm sure I can.

axman

What About Clinical Trials?

There are hundreds of thousands of men who have been diagnosed with prostate cancer. In many cases (like mine and maybe yours) there is no known cure. So what do you do next? Often the answer is to do nothing. That's not a very good answer.

Whatever the stage of your cancer there are probably clinical trials available that are testing new drugs or procedures. In most cases there is very little or no cost to you. But very few of us who have cancer ever participate in a clinical trial or clinical study. Why?


Maybe you don't know about the trials. Maybe your doctor recommends against them. In fact, only three to five percent of those with cancer ever participate in a clinical trial. A trial has no guarantees of success. Most trials are quite safe - the medications have been extensively tested for safety before they're ever tried on humans. But nobody knows what the ultimate results will be.

I have been in two clinical trials. Neither of them cured my prostate cancer or even slowed it down. But I'm glad I participated - I got free testing, I learned more about my own cancer, and I made contact with others going through what I was going through. And I'd participate in another if it looked promising.

Talk with your doctor and google Clinlical Trials with the name of your cancer. Find out what's available and then ask lots of questions. You have to apply and fill out endless forms, but you might get lucky and land in a study that tests the new super cancer drug. It could happen.

What is your experinece with clincial trials? What are your reservations?
axman

Welcome to the Axman Blog

Real men with real prostate cancer are everywhere. But you already knew that. If you're over 50 you probably have noticed that many of your friends and co-workers have had one or more prostate cancer treatments. The good news is - prostate cancer usually progresses slowly. The bad news is - it often continues to progress even when you have treatment.

What has been happening with your cancer? Do you have an exercise regimen or strange dietary routine that might help others? How do you keep your attitude positive? Where do you get your information?




axman