It’s All Fun and Games Until…

Most of my blogs recount the long and strange history of incurable prostate cancer and me. And there are a lot more types of cancer and other serious conditions such as diabetes, heart disease, Parkinson’s, arthritis, and on and on and on... All these diseases can be nasty, painful, deadly, very expensive, and millions of us live with them. Doctors, meds, tests, assessments, evaluations, and our lives seem to revolve around those things we can’t control. 

So I have found some not-so-new and exciting things for us to worry about and help take our minds off our already incurable diseases for a while! You can thank me later.

You know, of course, that our greatest risk of injury and death is a result of our own everyday actions and choices. Mother always told us, “Most injuries happen in the home.” And Mother was right. I’m also throwing in the things we do outside the home just for good measure. What are those personal risks? Here is but a small personal sampling:

1                   Our farm has many ladders, chain saws, table saws, circular saws, hammers, machines to cut grass and till gardens, and trees to cut for firewood. We still have most of our fingers and toes but that may be only a temporary condition.

2                   When not playing with tools of mass destruction, we drive at least 10,000 miles a year and fly another 10 or15,000. Then there are those forays into the unknown in our Jeep. It has a winch, so what could go wrong?

3                   My wife has a firm and fast rule. “You may not climb onto the roof unless there is an overwhelming need such as leaves in the gutter, limb debris, a stray kitten, or a clogged fireplace chimney. Statistics tell us a major cause of death and injury in older men is falling from ladders or roofs. She probably doesn’t know that.

4                   In the house, there is the ever popular slipping on wet floors, falling down stairs, falling upstairs, running into cupboard doors not properly shut, falling in the bathtub (yes, bathing is dangerous, too), and spilling hot coffee on ourselves. Running out of wine late at night is considered a disaster but seldom results in injury—unless we drunkenly go out looking for more.

But there are some risks we do not and will not pursue. We are active and have a lengthy bucket list but some things are definitely not on the list:

• 1       We are unlikely to be attacked and dismembered by sharks (a plane crash or sinking boat could change that one).
• 2       We will resist falling into an active volcano (but one could erupt quickly in our own back yard).
• 3       We will avoid avalanches near the top of Mt. Everest (back to the plane crash scenario).
• 4       We do not intend to be stomped by stampeding elephants (attending cheap circuses not withstanding).
• 5       We are not at high risk of being hit by a meteor (probably not, except when we may go outdoors).

I hope I have given you a lot more food for thought and worry. There are no promises or guarantees in life so… we might as well have as much fun as we can for as long as we can—meteors and angry elephants be damned!

Axman